1-2-3 Magic Quotes

“It is critical to your family’s well being and to your kids’ self-esteem that you like (not just love) your youngsters. What does “like” mean? Here’s an example. It’s a Saturday and you’re home by yourself for a few hours—a rare occurrence! Everyone has gone out. You’re listening to some music and just puttering around. You hear a noise outside and look out to see a car pulling up in the driveway. One of your kids gets out and heads for the front door. How do you feel in your gut right at that moment? If it’s “Oh no, the fun’s over!” that may not be like. If it’s “Oh good, I’ve got some company!” that’s more like like. Liking your children and having a good relationship with them is important for lots of reasons. The most important reason, though, may be that it’s simply more fun. Kids are naturally cute and enjoyable a lot of the time, and you want to take advantage of that valuable quality. And they only grow up with you once.”
― PhD, Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12: Effective Discipline for Children 2–12

“If you have a child who is doing something you don’t like, get really upset about it on a regular basis and, sure enough, she’ll repeat it for you.”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“Immediate testers, however, get worse at first. When you let them know you’re going to be the boss and you take away the power of their favorite testing strategies, these children deteriorate in two ways. Some will up the ante with a particular testing tactic. The volume and length of a child’s tantrums, for example, may double. Badgering may become more intense or aggressive, and martyrdom may become more whiney and pathetic.”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“Your child’s frontal cortex is not capable of processing a lot of words while trying to calm down and manage emotion at the same time. Even though the actual words a parent uses may be perfectly logical, the overload results in an angrier, overwhelmed child and an even more frustrated mom or dad.”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“controlling”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“A child who missed a nap, who feels hungry,”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“First, see if you can make three positive comments for every negative one (and, by the way, a count is one negative comment).”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“Well, this wouldn’t have happened if you’d have simply listened to me in the first place” are unnecessary.”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“Childhood is a period of transitory psychosis.”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“Children can’t respond properly to warnings if they don’t hear them clearly in the first place. Finally,”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“They are not born reasonable and unselfish; they are born unreasonable and selfish. They want what they want when they want it, and they will have a major fit if they don’t get it. Consequently, it is the parent’s job—and the teacher’s job—to help kids gradually learn frustration tolerance. In accomplishing this goal, adults need to be gentle, consistent, decisive, and calm.”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“effective parents expect their children to rise to life’s challenges (as you know, there are plenty!) and to respect the rules and limits that will be required for their behavior. These”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“Being warm and friendly also means liking—not just loving—your children. The”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“The point behind 1-2-3 Magic is that parents are ready for anything, rather than worrying what the kids are going to do next. The message is: “I love you, and it’s my job to train and discipline you. I don’t expect you to be perfect, and when you act up, this is what I will do.”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“Your kids are little. Both their bodies and their brains are still growing. No”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Gentle 3-Step Child & Toddler Discipline for Calm, Effective, and Happy Parenting

“and especially in video games. A typical news broadcast”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12

“With the Docking System, you tell the kids, “I have good news and bad news. The good news is that if you forget a chore, I’ll do it for you. The bad news is that you’re going to pay me for helping you out.” Then tell them the exact amount they will have to pay you.”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12

“friendliness also mean being sensitive to the children’s feelings: sharing their joy over a new friend, comforting them when their ice cream falls on the ground, listening sympathetically when they’re”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12

“Adults who believe in the Little Adult Assumption are going to rely heavily on words and reasons in trying to change the behavior of young kids. And words and reasons are going to be miserable failures much of the time.”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magic: Effective Discipline for Children 2-12

“Si tiene un niño que está haciendo algo que no le gusta a Ud., y Ud. se molesta con frecuencia, claro, el niño lo repitirá.”
― Thomas W. Phelan, 1-2-3 Magia: Disciplina Efectiva para Niños de 2 a 12