Smoking Gun Quotes

“My rule of thumb has always been to follow your dreams, not a man. And I stand by that to this day. But the redacted truth in that cynical philosophy is that with the right partner, you shouldn’t have to choose between the two.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“No one ever tells you the best part about being with a doctor. They’ll be able to revive you after you give yourself a heart attack from fucking them so hard. “Mine,”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“If you ever catch yourself smiling while eating a girl out at the same time, you’re a goner dude.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Shouldn’t we be blasting some hard rock music to set the mood or something? Feels like a missed opportunity,” Tripp asks. He’s dead serious.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“I’ve taken time for granted and wasted so much of it doing things I never truly wanted to do in my life. Time I should have spent really living, in every way that I desired, not in the way of false obligation. Living.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Jesus. If a spy movie and old Western had a lovechild, it would look like this,” I say as I make my way down the steps from the loft. They’re all huddled around the kitchen island looking at something on a computer screen. At first, I can barely make him out through the sea of denim jackets and cowboy hats, but Gage stands slightly taller and darker than the rest.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“If you care about someone, defend them out loud. It means more than empty words or promises. It’s proof.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“feel safe and connected here. Down to earth, loved, surrounded by support and the things that matter. Not the amount of money in your bank account at the end of the day or how spectacular your car or house is.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“nothing drops panties like a perfectly shaped black felt.” Can’t argue with that.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“I’ve been nearly killing myself through medical school as a means to an end. But looking around, these people are happy and thrilled regardless of whether their bank accounts might be bursting at the seams. That’s not what’s important to them. Their circle of people? That’s what they value. They’re living in a place that makes them happy.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“There’s a drought in Texas, honey.” My voice drops dangerously low. “Wouldn’t want to waste water when we could just shower together instead.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Great!” Bash sets his gun down on the entry table and claps his hands together with one loud smack. “Now that that’s over with, you got anything to eat around here? I hate killing on an empty stomach.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“The person who said the memories of your life flash before your eyes on the verge of death lied. It’s the future you’ll never have that invades your every thought. Made-up fairy tales swirl around behind your eyes reminding you of what could have been, but never will be.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Of all the decisions I’ve made in my life, saying yes to him was the easiest one.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“She’s it for me, and I know that with every fiber of my being.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Blythe isn’t the type of woman that you should hide away. She’s the type that you show off. Claim. Beat your barbaric fists against your chest and scream from the rooftops that you’re the lucky bastard whose arms she’s been sleeping in.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“I thought nothing could ruin me forever, but I was wrong. Blythe smiling while my hand is around her throat? That’ll do it.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Whether or not she or I realized it, she’s mine to protect. To love and the be with. I’m done with the fun and games.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“When you’re working your life away, you feel more like a robot. Not a living, breathing, feeling human.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“letting other people take care of you doesn’t make you weak. It makes you human.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Down to earth, loved, surrounded by support and the things that matter. Not the amount of money in your bank account at the end of the day or how spectacular your car or house is.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Kiss me,” she whispers. “Kiss me like my mouth and every other part of me belongs to you.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Oh shit. You’re in love with her,” he deadpans. His jaw about hits the brush-covered ground. I don’t have the heart to deny it.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Can’t sleep without me, babe?”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“When it comes to Blythe Farrow, I’m good as gone. She just doesn’t know it yet.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“My smile has everything to do with being excited about a night out with my best friend and my brother. Nothing to do with the grumpy cowboy downstairs who all but sent me into cardiac arrest when he touched my hand. Nothing at all.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“I decide to look down. Oh, he’s affected alright, and oh my God. The bigger the hands analogy suddenly makes a whole lot of sense to me, although I never believed it was true until now. My mouth drops open.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Mayday. Mayday! Naked cowboy entering the shower.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Is there some sort of switch I can flip in my brain that will keep the heart eyes from showing up in my irises while she’s here? It doesn’t matter how beautiful she is or how addicting it was to touch her for even a few moments. She’s my best friend’s sister. And I can’t be into a girl I just met less than ten minutes ago, right?”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun

“Are you coming?” She asks innocently. I snap my gaze up to hers and widen my eyes. “To the bar,” she clarifies with a knowing smirk. Right. She’s not wondering if I just nutted in my jeans from a fucking handshake.”
― Lainey Lawson, Smoking Gun