Fi Quotes

“...time is only as dense as the thoughts that you push through it.”
― Alexandra Fuller, Fi: A Memoir of My Son

“But his body, so cold, so unrelentingly unmoving was beginning to belong back to Earth, a block of perfect marble into which, even now, I tried to press my own life, exhaling, exhaling, exhaling. It's fruitless, you know it's fruitless, but you do it anyway, entreating your dead son to return to this perfectly usable thing, this beautiful, still body, so umblemished, so strong, so midstride.”
― Alexandra Fuller, Fi: A Memoir of My Son

“You can give your child anything.
You can give him his life, even, but not yours.
And you can't give him his life back, once lost.”
― Alexandra Fuller, Fi: A Memoir of My Son

“I know that the deer wasn't Fi any more than a clock is time, or a flame is a fire, or rain a river; but the deer and Fi were connected, are connected, in the same ways as those things. Life is ALL possibility resolving into a doe, a dear, a rock-solid form. Arising, falling away, arising, falling away. Life is the same simple sentence said over and over; it's a tide, in and out.”
― Alexandra Fuller, Fi: A Memoir of My Son

“One of millions of mothers to have lost a child every year, fifteen thousand a day. If none of us suffered, where would we be? Without wise women is where; suffering brings wisdom. So, a gift, this suffering, a promissory note for sagacity. Meantime, the actual suffering. I couldn't see my hand in front of my face, it was that dark.”
― Alexandra Fuller, Fi: A Memoir of My Son

“The way a pilot sees wind in clouds or a sailor reads currents in water, I look unconsciously for stories to remind me where I am, to remind me that whatever I'm going through, millions have been here before, are here now, will be here again.”
― Alexandra Fuller, Fi: A Memoir of My Son