Crimes Against Magic Quotes

“The memory of being shot by a woman pretty much kills any sexual urge you have toward her. And if it doesn't, you have issues.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“Words actually failed me. I felt as dumb as my lounge-less friend in the corner. "You injected me with vampire blood?" My words were said slowly, ensuring that I didn't get one wrong or accidentally call Francis a fucking asshat. "You're a vampire?"
Francis' expression managed to convey how stupid he thought that question was. "I live underground, and you've never seen me outside. I'm pale in complexion ands obviously hundreds of years old. What did you think I was? Agoraphobic?”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“left her to work, grabbed a book that Holly had lent me, and tried to get past the second chapter. It was about vampires and werewolves and the love of a good woman. Apparently it had a lot of fans. I wasn’t amongst them. About thirty pages in and I’d already come to the conclusion that it was shit, but I figured it could only get better.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“Everyone hates fractions. That’s why they make you do them. It’s character building.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“Most people would rather hear a reasonable lie than the fantastical truth.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“The second school of magic is called Omega magic. This magic is too powerful to be wielded by a novice. For this reason, any sorcerer wishing to use Omega magic is usually millennia old at least. It consists of mind, matter, shadow, and light.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“wasn’t entirely sure where she was going. I was beginning to think Diane was going to offer me her daughter’s hand in marriage in exchange for a few chickens and a goat. Eventually I decided to go with honesty.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“The man-at-arms in charge of one lesson told us that we were never to kill an unarmed opponent, that it was tantamount to murder. I suggested that an unarmed opponent was actually the best person to kill, as it was safer than fighting someone armed to the teeth.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“After a hundred years, the line between murderer and celebrity blurred to the point of nonexistence.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“Contrary to popular belief, there is honor amongst thieves. It just comes in a monetary form.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“Something in me changed. As I watched Lee threaten his sister, I contemplated a few dozen ways to kill or maim him. And all of those methods would take only a few seconds. It was like trying to find a tiny crack on a vase and suddenly noticing dozens of flaws present. Flaws I could take advantage of.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“He explained that a sorcerer’s magic is bound to two different schools. The first is Elemental—water, earth, fire, and air. Most users of magic start in this school; the magic I’d used in my target’s bedroom was air, hence the white glyphs, which crossed over my arms. Each type of magic corresponds to a different color glyph—white for air, orange for fire, green for earth, and blue for water.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“A crime against magic.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“The clock on the wall said it was just after three a.m., although with a constant tick every second, it soon became clear in my mind that the clock might not make it to four a.m. before being thrown through a window.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“You’re a vampire?” Francis’ expression managed to convey how stupid he thought that question was. “I live underground, and you’ve never seen me outside. I’m pale in complexion and obviously hundreds of years old. What did you think I was? Agoraphobic?” I shrugged. “It just never occurred to me, that’s all. Although, with all the crazy shit I’ve seen in the last few days, I probably should have figured it out for myself.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“Welkin was a fucking monster.” Her words dripped bile. “He experimented on children and made Josef Mengele look like a nice rational human being. He deserved a lot worse.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“I ordered two Cokes—alcohol was not going to be a good idea—and took them over to our table. “How very gentlemanly,” she said. “I just didn’t want you to get me one and lace it with sedatives.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“My mind crept back to the last time I’d seen her naked, moving on top of me. And then it went to the moment she shot me. The memory of being shot by a woman pretty much kills any sexual urge you have toward her. And if it doesn’t, you have issues.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“I’m not here to fight, Nate,” Jenny said. That was strange, because my first impulse was to throw a giant ball of flame at her. “You shot me,” I said holding back my sudden anger. “With a tranquilizer dart.” “Oh, that’s okay then. Wanna shoot me a few more times?” Jenny smiled; she had a nice smile. She’d”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“The girl didn’t want to wear the Beefeater-style hat she had on, and the dad wasn’t happy with his daughter’s tantrum. To be fair, it was an ugly hat, and making his child wear one probably went against the Geneva Convention.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“I’m good, thanks. Blew up my flat, got shot at. Oh, killed a man in cold blood. Been quite an eventful day. Least it’s not raining though, eh?” “Are you quite finished?” I had more, but I thought it better to save them for a more willing audience.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“I picked up the gun and placed it in my holster, fastening my jacket up afterward. I caught a glimpse of Holly’s worried expression. “Just in case,” I said. “I won’t use it unless I have to.” Somewhere inside me a voice whispered—but if I have to use it, I’ll make sure I’ll be the one walking away.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“Two women sat behind a large reception desk opposite the three massive turnstile doors and across an expansive lobby. They were probably mild-mannered receptionists, but they appeared more akin to someone you’d meet in the dead of night with a large knife.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“You don’t understand,” she said meekly. “Really? Okay, you’re a special case then, are you? Unlike all the others in abusive relationships, your man really does love you. He’s a good man deep down. Tells you he’ll change.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“Skull tattoos adorned each arm, and someone had written love and hate on his knuckles so badly that it looked as if it had been done by an illiterate blind man.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“posts. He was her mum’s boyfriend, Phil, who from all accounts was a nasty piece of shit. And when a thief calls you a nasty piece of shit, you just know you’re not a good person.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“Each type of magic corresponds to a different color glyph—white for air, orange for fire, green for earth, and blue for water.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic