Shame Interrupted Quotes

“Jesus entered the temple area and revealed that he was the perfect and final priest; even more, he was the entire temple. All the temple symbols suddenly came to life. He was the wash basin, the Water of Life. He was the bread of the Presence, the Bread of Life. He was the candlesticks, the Light of the World. He was the perfect priest, the Great High Priest who would offer the sacrifice, and he was the sacrifice itself, “the Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world!” (John 1:29). Everything in the Old Testament temple was gathered together and fulfilled in Jesus.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Jesus always interpreted hardship in light of the end of the story, and at the end of the story we will be without shame.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“When you believe what God has said rather than lies, you are doing valuable work. When you choose hope over despair, your choice has lasting significance. When you get out of bed and persevere in ordinary obedience because you are representing the King, your labor is noticed even by heavenly beings (Ephesians 3:10). When you pursue holiness because you are holy, you find honor that lasts.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Don’t let religious-sounding reluctance fool you. When you plead “unworthy” and refuse to be served by God, you place your judgment about yourself above God’s. You say you would prefer to go it alone, and you imply that your unworthiness goes beyond the scope of God’s mercy and grace. You must think that God cleanses you only from ordinary sins, not from the spectacular ones.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water. So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary, beholding your power and glory. Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you. (Psalm 63:1–3) These words might not speak on your behalf, but they can—they must. If you think they can’t, that is not shame talking. It is hopelessness, indifference, and a heart that is getting hard. These are completely understandable, but they are also a whopper of a lie. A warning about “a heart that is getting hard” is not the nicest comment to slip into a book’s final chapter. But please understand why I give it. There is a paralytic quality to shame that leaves you powerless, unable to put up the least resistance. It leads you to believe the lie that Christ’s words to you are mere words, which they are not. They are words of power that heal the sick and raise the dead. When people encounter the gospel, limbs suddenly begin to move and death gives way to life. So, when you hear these deep truths and still think you are paralyzed, understand why. You have been motionless for a while and your muscle memory says you can’t move. But your memory is lying. You can move; you can hear, believe, and declare. If you are passive and hopeless, take a more radical approach. Adopt the topsy-turvy, surprising culture of the kingdom of God. In that kingdom we aren’t shy about looking at our hearts and identifying resistance where we once found only powerlessness. The warning about being hard-hearted can be a reason to hope.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“It is as if we want to believe the lie. Perhaps we blame ourselves because in a strange way it helps us feel as if we have more control. If we are responsible for whatever went wrong, for whatever hurt us, we might be able to figure out how to keep it from happening again.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Shame is the deep sense that you are unacceptable because of something you did, something done to you, or something associated with you. You feel exposed and humiliated. Or, to strengthen the language, You are disgraced because you acted less than human, you were treated as if you were less than human, or you were associated with something less than human, and there are witnesses.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“People familiar with shame are willing to wash feet, but they are uncomfortable with other people washing their feet. They are better at serving than being served. Well, get used to being served.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Watch them as they sit in the filth of their daily lives. Watch them as they hear rumors of someone who cares and has power. Watch them stand up when they receive news that Jesus is approaching. Watch their steps quicken when they hear the crowd. Watch them become an unstoppable force when they see him. Don’t get in the way of someone who is both desperate and hopeful when the King is near. These are the men and women of faith. Join them. Don’t be one who happens to bump into Jesus in a crowded marketplace. Instead, join those who purposefully touched him. Please, join them.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“     You feel like an outcast. You don’t belong.      You feel naked. While everyone else is walking around with their clothes on, you feel exposed and vulnerable. You are seen, and what others see is not pretty.      You feel unclean. Something is wrong with you. You are dirty. Even worse, you are contaminated. There is a difference between being a bit muddy and harboring a deadly, contagious virus.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“there is an important difference between embarrassment and shame. Whatever caused your embarrassment has been experienced by everyone else too, at one point or another. Your sense of social isolation was fleeting. Within the hour—or decade—you laugh about it. With shame, you never laugh at it. It feels like unending embarrassment, but it is more than that. Embarrassment doesn’t afflict the core of the person’s soul, but shame becomes your identity. It touches everything about you. Embarrassment points toward shame, but it wears away over time. For shame to wear away, it feels as though the shame-ful person would have to wear away, and some people have tried such things.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Shame is life-dominating and stubborn. Once entrenched in your heart and mind, it is a squatter that refuses to leave.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“You never expected that God himself would, by his representatives, actually come close to unclean people and touch them. The Holy One is not human. The triune God is not human. Don’t limit God’s character by your expectations of what a decent human king might do. You expect God to reject; he accepts. You expect him to turn away; he turns toward.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“If you want Jesus, you must be willing to accept the honor that goes with the relationship. Your royal status—ascribed to you, not achieved—has been unveiled.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Have you ever thought about Jesus’ physical appearance? If you think about the paintings, he was a relatively handsome Dutchman. But if you think about a prophetic description, “he had no form or majesty that we should look at him, and no beauty that we should desire him” (Isaiah 53:2). To put it diplomatically, he didn’t look like much, and sleepless nights filled with prayer vigils probably didn’t help.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“With our touch, Jesus becomes our scapegoat. In his touch, Jesus takes our sin and absorbs our shame (Psalm 69:9; Romans 15:3), and we receive his righteousness. If you prefer symmetry in your relationships, in which you give a gift of similar value to the one you receive, you have not yet touched Jesus.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“This is the last word. Jesus always has the last word, and it is always a good last word. It is always about him and it always takes you by surprise with his love and acceptance. What is your response? John’s message is clear: worship him. What does worship him mean? It means everything. It means you turn away from the stagnant pools where you once drank. For the Samaritan woman, it meant she would align her lifestyle with his kingdom. In technical terms, she would repent. She would turn away from acts of death to receive living water, and she would love it. For the young man struggling with thoughts of same-sex attraction, it means that he says to Jesus, “You are not like anyone I have ever known. I trust you.” For the anorectic woman, it means that she no longer puts all her trust in her husband’s love but trusts in Jesus alone, who is the only one capable of bearing the weight of her tremendous emptiness and need.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“What is most important is that you look away from yourself to the true God. No matter who you are or where you are from, you will be able to know him and worship him. And when you worship him, it means you are accepted into his presence.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Our fears have typically already decided that the worst is about to happen. Catastrophe is upon us and there is no hope. But “Don’t be afraid,” when spoken by the Lord, is a promise that the end will be different from what we predict.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“We loathe worthlessness, and for good reason. We have a primal sense that we exist for something better and, indeed, we do. We are created in the King’s image and created to be with him. But there is a reason we oppose worthlessness that is much darker: we want worth in ourselves, apart from our relationship with Jesus. When this other reason dominates, all the talk about the glory of the King and the reflected glory we experience as we are joined to him by faith is meaningless. Our hearts are searching for something else. The only solution is to turn away from putting our trust in something other than Jesus, which is actually nothing, and turn back to the Lord. It is called repentance, and it is the way to clarity and rest.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“These days, shame is emerging from the shadows and beginning to have its own identity. For example, if you talk about guilt to people under thirty, you often get blank stares. But if you talk about “worthless,” “failure,” or “shame,” they feel as if you have deciphered the core of their being. For them, shame is arguably the human problem. If the next generation is talking about it, that’s a good sign, in the sense that shame may soon receive the attention it deserves. Meanwhile, you won’t hear about it on the national news nor even in many Sunday sermons. It’s hard to know how to speak about the unspeakable. You don’t mention shameful things in polite conversation.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Ironically, our desire to clean ourselves actually minimizes the problem of uncleanness. It assumes we can give ourselves a good enough scrubbing to get a little holy before we meet the Holy One.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Once we get over the mild jolt to our pride—I would like my spouse to love me because she thinks I am the greatest male alive—we couldn’t ask for anything better. The character of God is the basis for our connection to him, not our intrinsic worth. Self-worth, or anything we think would make us acceptable to God, would suit our pride but it has the disturbing side-effect of making the cross of Jesus Christ less valuable. If we have worth in ourselves, there is no reason to connect to the infinite worth of Jesus and receive what he has done for us. So if you feel unworthy of God’s love, you can turn in one of two directions. You can turn inward, in which case you are looking for a little self-worth to bring to the Lord, and that is pride. Or you can turn to him and discover that he has a heart for the unworthy. He pursues those who, like Hagar, have no glory or honor in themselves.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Try changing the subject so it is more about God than about your shame. The basic idea is to focus on the matchless worth of the Lord God and then get connected to him. For you are a people holy to the LORD your God. The LORD your God has chosen you to be a people for his treasured possession, out of all the peoples who are on the face of the earth. It was not because you were more in number than any other people that the LORD set his love on you and chose you, for you were the fewest of all peoples, but it is because the LORD loves you and is keeping the oath that he swore to your fathers, that the LORD has brought you out with a mighty hand and redeemed you from the house of slavery, from the hand of Pharaoh king of Egypt. (Deuteronomy 7:6–8) These words are exactly what you need. They say that God is the better King. He invites you to his kingdom. He is faithful to you because of his love, not your worthiness. He loves us not because we are lovable but because he is love. And, in this particular passage, he is talking to scoundrels who are certainly no better than you.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“It is one thing to die. It is another thing for an innocent person to die for a guilty one. It is something much more that Jesus would take on himself all the curses the world deserved in concentrated form. This meant that his relationship with his Father, the one thing that had sustained him throughout all the previous insults and rejection, was about to be removed. Moses knew he could not lead the people through the wilderness unless God was present. Without his Father’s grace and mercy, Jesus had to wonder if he would be able to take one more step, let alone make it all the way to the cross. So he prayed. The result was that he was strengthened. His mission came into full view (John 18:11), and he was able to see the divine plan to the end. From that point on, the gospel accounts communicate two unmistakable points. They press these points until we are undone by them: Jesus experienced incomparable shame, and he experienced it at the hands of everyone.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“In this classic reversal of reality, we do not stand before him, but the King stands before us. We question him; he doesn’t question us. The irony of it all! While the name of the Lord was constantly blasphemed by men, Jesus is now accused of being a blasphemer (Matthew 26:65). Talk about a primitive form of defense—projecting your guilt onto another. Could it be any clearer that Jesus had come to the anti-kingdom, where everything was the opposite of the way it was intended? The mocking was nonstop. Accusers took turns kneeling before him, feigning homage.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“     First we saw only our own shame. Now we see that Jesus’ shame was deeper than our own, and we were among the scorners.      First we saw only our own alienation and rejection. Now we see that Jesus’ alienation and rejection was at the hands of the entire world, ourselves included.      First we saw only contempt and self-contempt. Now we see that all human contempt was focused on Jesus—and we participated. No matter how stubbornly resistant to change your shame might be, witnessing extreme shame like this will move your shame to second place in your thoughts. This doesn’t mean it disappears, but it makes a difference when your shame is number two on your list rather than number one. It makes a huge difference. When Jesus and his shame occupy our attention, our own shame becomes less controlling. Let us “fix our eyes on Jesus” (Hebrews 12:2 NIV). Fix your eyes on the one who absorbed shame and then announced that its reign was over. At least you will no longer feel alone.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Though the cross and everything leading up to it violate our sensibilities and we are rightly aghast, the reality is that human beings have never liked God very much. At the cross, the nature of God was most fully revealed. As a result, human contempt was also most fully revealed and brought to a laser-like focus and intensity.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“Shame can be removed, and you can still be you. Despite your feeling that your destiny and shame’s destiny are identical—that if shame no longer exists, you won’t either—the reality is that you will be more you without shame.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection

“The language of shame is extreme. Hear it enough and you believe it. You are told you are disgusting and unclean, and eventually you believe you are.”
― Edward T. Welch, Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection