Uncle John's Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader Quotes

“He who has a why to live can bear almost any how.”
― Bathroom Readers' Institute, Uncle John's Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader

“The world is full of willing people; some willing to work, the rest willing to let them.”
― Bathroom Readers' Institute, Uncle John's Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader

“MOO: In 2012 a cow named Darcy walked up to a McDonald’s drive-through window and just stood there. Her owner—Sandy Winn of Brush, Colorado—told police that Darcy had walked the half-mile to the McDonald’s because she “just likes attention.” MOO: Why did a cow climb five sets of stairs in an apartment building in Lesogorsk, Russia, in 2012? She was running away from an excited bull that was chasing her through a field. According to reports, the frightened cow “had to be lassoed and virtually dragged to the lobby while mooing in protest.” MOO: In 2011 a two-year-old boy named Tha Sophat got sick while staying at his grandfather’s farm in Thailand. He wouldn’t eat or drink, and his condition worsened…until he began suckling milk straight from the cow’s udder. The cow didn’t seem to mind, and after a month of nursing, Tha was better. “The neighbors say he will be ashamed when he grows up,” the grandpa told Reuters. “But his health is fine. He is strong and he doesn’t have diarrhea.”
― Bathroom Readers' Institute, Uncle John's Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader

“MOO Moo. MOO: One morning in 2012, commuters in Rayburn, Pennsylvania, got stuck in a traffic jam when a cow and a bull decided to have “relations” in the middle of a busy intersection. Police tried shooing them away, but, according to reports, “That just got the bull mad and it started to escalate.” Game officials arrived and steered the couple into a private trailer. MOO: In 2012 a cow named Sadhana and her “bullfriend” got married in a lavish wedding ceremony in Guradia, India. More than 1,500 guests attended. Reason for the wedding: Sadhana’s owners were unable to have children, so without a daughter to marry off, the well-to-do couple married off their cow. MOO: An 18-year-old thief wearing a full-body cow costume stole 26 gallons of milk from a Walmart in Garrisonville, Virginia, in 2011. Witnesses recalled seeing him exit the store “on all fours.” Hours later police apprehended the human cow “skipping down the sidewalk” in front of a nearby McDonald’s.”
― Bathroom Readers' Institute, Uncle John's Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader

“Mark Twain on Jane Austen: “Every time I read Pride and Prejudice, I want to dig her up and hit her over the skull with her own shin-bone.”
― Bathroom Readers' Institute, Uncle John's Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader

“got his first big television role, co-starring in the sitcom Car 54, Where Are You?, and in 1964 the 6'5″ Gwynne landed his best-known role—the”
― Bathroom Readers' Institute, Uncle John's Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader

“In America any boy may become president, and I suppose it’s just one of the risks he takes.” —Adlai Stevenson”
― Bathroom Readers' Institute, Uncle John's Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader

“The 2011 Bar-B-Que cookoff in Houston came to an abrupt halt after one of the grillers, 51-year-old Mike Hamby, threw a canister of tear gas into a rival team’s tent. The noxious fumes quickly spread to other tents. Dozens of people were sickened, and the contest was postponed. It’s unclear why Hamby threw the canister, but apparently there was a “disagreement.” After the smoke cleared, he was taken into custody…and later fired from his job as an officer with the Houston Police Department.”
― Bathroom Readers' Institute, Uncle John's Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader