Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter Quotes

“I realized I didn’t know what Tiffany liked to do anymore. She was in a sober phase, but I had warned Dad that cutting alcohol out of her life was probably only the first step in the rehab process.

Once that problem had been dealt with, I suspected the real work would need to begin. Some deeper unhappiness or instability kept pushing her to self-medicate.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“I could see a window into my new life, controlled only by me, and the thought of being a million miles from home and Hollywood morphed from frightening into freeing.

If I left behind everything that tethered me to my past, I would fly or drown, but I would know for sure whether I could live without Mom or the business driving my life.

Maybe there was another option, another path, another life. Maybe there wasn’t. I hadn’t really considered the possibility that there could be another way to live until that weekend. Once I opened the door to that possibility, it couldn’t be closed.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“Stanford summer school had been even more fantastic than I’d imagined. Not only did I have total freedom and control over my life and my time, but I was introduced to a whole world beyond Hollywood where intellectual curiosity and the ability to reason were the main values, not body type and how convincingly I could pretend to be someone else. I hadn’t realized that school could be more than figuring out how to crush a test.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“To my own surprise, I started to strain and blister under Mom’s totalitarian rule.

I had always faulted Tiffany for not simply following the party line and promoting harmony.

But now that I was carrying out that mandate alone, I realized what a burden it was. It was exhausting to constantly manage Mom’s mood.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“I started 9th grade as the only child at home, which certainly made life a lot more peaceful.

The bathroom I’d shared with Tiffany was finally fully mine. We weren’t fighting about clothes, and there were no more quarrels with Mom about how late Tiffany could stay out with Cliff or the best way to be or dress.

But my new status as the only child made me the sole focus of Mom’s attention, which was a little much for a 15-year-old yearning instead for some independence.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“For the first half of 7th grade, I was so distracted by a new middle school and a huge batch of new classmates and friends that I barely noticed that I hadn’t worked much.

I was grateful not to be working, in fact, because I didn’t want to miss a minute of my new life.

I moved from class to class, mixing with different kids every period. I had eight teachers instead of one, a whole range of new subjects to dig into, like chemistry and Spanish. And then there was a brand-new selection of boys. The student body was almost 10 times the size of my old school.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“Tiffany and Mom’s bickering had become an almost constant din that kept the atmosphere around the house tense.

Tiffany’s attitude exacerbated Mom’s dark moods and each one’s negative energy fueled the other’s.

Tiffany would make an unnecessary, snide remark to Mom, and the back-and-forth would escalate until Mom was confiscating her favorite jeans, taking away her phone, or just hitting her with the closest object, like a hanger or a belt.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“Tiffany rarely went on auditions anymore. It had been ages since she’d really worked.

I hadn’t considered that there’d come a time when she wouldn’t act at all, and I was alarmed to see show business evaporating from her life, which I hadn’t thought possible for either of us. Riding felt like the last thing we shared.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“Tiffany had checked out of most of the activities we used to do together, except riding, which she passionately loved. She had graduated to 9th grade where she exercised her independence and grappled with the awkwardness that came with being a teenager.

I had grown almost as tall as her, but she had fully developed, which only added to her shyness. Her posture had changed. She seemed to have rolled inward, physically and mentally, withdrawing from our family.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“In the spring of 1982, I was sad to leave my new friends, but happy enough to go back to school and have more time to ride my horse.

Besides, every job I had ever had had come to an end. Why would this one be any different? But Mom reacted as if someone close to her had died.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“Michael expected us to work like adults, but he also engineered horseplay in between shots. On rare occasion, he even wasted film.

One blazing hot day in the Valley, I said my line, and when he turned to answer, he opened his mouth and a live bullfrog jumped out.

This was no prop or product of Hollywood special effects. It was a filthy toad he’d found on the ground in between takes.

I screamed in terror, no doubt only slightly less afraid than the poor frog who thought he’d turned into Michael’s lunch.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“At first, I enjoyed the novelty of being recognized by strangers. Then the attention made me terribly self-conscious.

I started to hide my face or turn away when a stranger started to recognize me. If they got up the nerve to ask, “Are you Cassandra from Little House on the Prairie?”

I liked to say no, but I felt guilty when I did this because I knew I was being rude. I didn’t want to be mean or lie, but all the attention was just too much even though I had recently turned 9 years old. I was still a kid, and it was an invasion.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“I had made the mistake of speaking up during one of Mom’s stories before and learned that no one but Mom was allowed to talk.

Afterward, when we’d gotten in the car, she’d pinched my arm ferociously and said, “You are never to contradict me in front of another adult ever again. Do you understand me?”

The pain shooting through my arm confirmed how serious she was.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“We circled back and pulled up next to Tiffany, who was standing on the sidewalk sobbing right where we’d left her.

Tiffany got back in the car. I saw her face for an instant before she climbed back into her seat. Tears covered her cheeks, her eyes were red, and the sides of her mouth were slack with fear and humiliation.

She was a shadow of the girl who charged across summer camp to save me from the swim counselors.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“A week later, Mom brought the tambourine home from Parents’ Night.

“This isn’t good. Did you actually turn this in?”

I didn’t say anything, since the answer seemed obvious.

“You can’t turn in crap like this. This is truly horrible. Why didn’t you tell me you had a project to do? What else are you too lazy to do properly?”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“There was something about commercials that Tiffany didn’t like, even at an early age. When the director said “Action,” she shrank into her shell like the turtle on my school playground.

Mom initially tried to coax her into being more playful, but as Tiffany grimaced and recoiled, Mom got increasingly annoyed and angry. I couldn’t understand why my sister didn’t embrace the attention.

One thing was clear: the more Mom tried to tug some enthusiasm out of her, the more she resisted.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“By the time I got to kindergarten, I was an old soul. That’s not to say I was joyless; far from it. I had just been around the block many more times than my peers.

I was barely five years old, but I was comfortable working with adults and had the self-assurance of a child twice my age.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“My sister and I were often booked together because we showed a family resemblance without appearing too much alike. Tiffany was always referred to as “the pretty one.”

With her thick brunette hair and heavy brows, she reminded casting directors of a young Brooke Shields, which at the time was a major selling point.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“When I stepped out of my family’s station wagon and walked onto the playground, the “Leia Do” served as a beacon announcing to my classmates which game we’d be playing at recess.

I jumped and climbed and flew around the jungle gym while Thomas and Mike and Scott sliced the air with imaginary light sabers and shielded me from impending doom. It was glorious. Gloria Steinem would not have approved, but she wasn’t there and I didn’t care.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“A long tradition of barter was born that day. An extended series of negotiations during which, at exactly the right moment, Mom would promise something irresistible in exchange for my doing something that, ironically, I would usually be willing to do otherwise.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“Tiffany was always referred to as “the pretty one.”

With her thick brunette hair and heavy brows, she reminded casting directors of a young Brooke Shields, which at the time was a major selling point.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“You could always hear Mom coming down the long hallway. Even though the hall was covered with carpet, the floor creaked in predictable spots.

She’d thundered down it so many times to stop us from wrestling over a toy or making a racket that when we heard the first footfall, we knew exactly how much time we had before she reached the bedroom to murder us both.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“Brian was a great playmate. He let me have whatever I wanted. He was a keeper. He had soft blond hair that fell in his eyes as we spent countless hours together playing house.

Even when he wasn’t there, I pretended he was. He didn’t say much either in person or in my imagination, making him the perfect match for a bossy, precocious girl like me.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“This was half my life. When we were at home, my sister and I lived in a state of constant wariness, always reading Mom’s mood and bracing for impact when that mood turn ominous.

She was mercurial, domineering, but also devoted. She took her job of molding us into outstanding examples of young American girlhood very seriously and she brooked no nonsense when we resisted her efforts.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“My face slowly flushed as I saw Mom drive by a second time, looking increasingly frantic. She circled the block a third time as I lay there, paralyzed.

I wanted to run out from my hiding place, but I knew she would be so furious, there would be no happy ending.

What did I want? An apology for throwing me out of the car? Maybe just an end to the domination.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir

“She pulled to the side of the road and told me to get out. “Find your own way home. And another place to live while you’re at it.”
― Melissa Francis, Diary of a Stage Mother's Daughter: a Memoir