The Maelstrom Quotes

“The Lover's Maxim
'If you can'r be handsome, be rich. If you can't be roich, be strong. If you can't be strong, be witty'
'What if you can'r be witty?'
'Learn the guitar.”
― Henry H. Neff, The Maelstrom

“Most girls take one look at you and swoon. You've never had to really work for someone's affection or put effort into maintaining it. In many ways, your natural gifts have done you a disservice-- they've stunted your sensitivity and charm! You've never had to develop insight into what will make a girl laugh and come to love you for reasons that aren't handsome or heroic. That's why smees are experts on the subtle arts of courtship and seduction; nothing comes easy to us, but we do understand and live by the Lover's Maxim."

"And what on earth is the Lover's Maxim?" asked Maz, feeling very uninformed.

The smee cleared his throat. "If you can't be handsome, be rich. If you can't be rich, be strong. If you cant be strong, be witty."

"But what if you can't be witty?" Max wondered.

"Learn the guitar.”
― Henry H. Neff, The Maelstrom

“In the common room, they found Emer dozing in her chair, Lila scratching at the door, and Mine stirring a large pot and peering at its contents with an anxious, irritated expression. With a groan, the Archmage strode across the room and flung open the windows.
"It just needs more basil," Mine assured him. "No, it does not," Bram declared. "It needs less garlic. Didn't I tell you to follow a recipe?"
"I did follow a recipe!" Shouted Mine, defiantly flinging the rest of the basil into the pot.

"Show it to me, then."
"I threw it in the fire!"
"What have I told you about lying, child?"
"To get better at it!”
― Henry H. Neff, The Maelstrom

“You have the courage and will to overcome your fear and do what's required.”
― Henry H. Neff, The Maelstrom

“War breaks many things...It can break bodies and hearts. It can break promises, too. But it can't break spirits...not if those who are fighting believe in their cause.”
― Henry H. Neff, The Maelstrom

“A warrior craves honor and excellence, not a measure of mild years. Those who cringe at death are half dead themselves; they forever keep to the shallows of life!”
― Henry H. Neff, The Maelstrom

“Some people are born great, but no one is born good. That is a choice they must make for themselves.”
― Henry H. Neff, The Maelstrom

“Sorry, Toby," said Max, plucking up the smee by one end. "This will have to do." He unceremoniously dunked the creature into a nearby pitcher of water. "Better?"

"Invigorated," groused the smee. "And now I will ask you to kindly put me down and never to grab me by that particular part of my anatomy again."

Horrified, Max promptly dropped the smee onto its pillow.”
― Henry H. Neff, The Maelstrom