Life After Theft Quotes

“People always assume I play basketball because I'm tall. I'd like to ask people if they play miniature golf because they're short, but I had a feeling breaking that one out right now wasn't going to endear me to anyone.”
― Aprilynne Pike, Life After Theft

“I argued that she wasn't even alive when My Little Pony originally aired, but she retorted that she wasn't alive now, either, and there's just no good comeback to that.”
― Aprilynne Pike, Life After Theft

“I am not afraid of bras!" I said, knowing, even as the words escaped my mouth, that I sounded like a total moron.”
― Aprilynne Pike, Life After Theft

“Jeff! Look at you!" my mom gushed. "You look like Ryan Seacrest."

Was that a compliment?”
― Aprilynne Pike, Life After Theft

“Talk about doomed love. He's gay, she's dead, stay tuned.”
― Aprilynne Pike, Life After Theft

“The first thing I saw was the pink bubble gum, four feet lower than it should have been, inches above the ground, and framed by a set of perfectly painted lips.
It was one of those huge bubbles you just know is going to pop and cover the girl's face, and she'll shriek and yell and whine that her makeup is ruined, blah, blah, blah. But the bubble didn't pop—she did that thing where you suck all the air back into your mouth, and the bubble deflated into a little pink heap.”
― Aprilynne Pike, Life After Theft

“Hey, keys!

Oh-my keys.

"Okay," she said. "Let's go."

I am such a loser.”
― Aprilynne Pike, Life After Theft