An Affair to Dismember Quotes

“You were in a libido freeze for some reason. You didn’t care about men, good-looking or not. Usually a libido freeze is caused by divorce or death.” “Or commitment issues,”
― Elise Sax, An Affair to Dismember

“who doesn’t mind if she’s a few pounds overweight. Every man wants a floozy he can take home to Mom. See? Asking their opinion only leads to headaches you could die from. Take it from me, I’ve been doing this a lot of years. Nobody knows what they want. You have to size a person up and tell them what they want. It might take convincing, but you’ll widen their horizons, and they’ll thank you for it. Eventually. Remember, love can come from anywhere, usually where you least expect it. Tell them not to be afraid, even if it hits them on the head and hurts a lot at first. With enough time, any schlimazel can turn into a Cary Grant or a presentable floozy. Lesson 22, Matchmaking”
― Elise Sax, An Affair to Dismember

“schlimazel”
― Elise Sax, An Affair to Dismember

“Pinkie,” he said, “make no mistake. I don’t wax, prune, or buff. I’m more the come-as-I-am kind of man. I come natural.” A tiny droplet of spittle dripped from my mouth.”
― Elise Sax, An Affair to Dismember

“What do you metrosexuals do to prepare for hot dates? Don’t you need to wax something or prune something? Before you get your nails buffed, you can drop me off at my grandmother’s.”
― Elise Sax, An Affair to Dismember

“So, my words of wisdom to women are, fall in love with a man who has a little boring and a little interesting in him.”
― Elise Sax, An Affair to Dismember

“I couldn’t help but wish for a straitjacket. Jane was the queen of loop-de-loo. Her potato was half baked. Her pancake had flipped. Her milk had turned, and her brownie was all nuts. In other words, Jane was crazy, and despite being”
― Elise Sax, An Affair to Dismember

“I flicked my soft hair back. It swished against my shoulder, falling in a cascade before returning elegantly to its original position. Oh, nice.”
― Elise Sax, An Affair to Dismember

“I was a woman with wild, out-of-control, frizzy hair. Maybe change needed to start at the top.”
― Elise Sax, An Affair to Dismember

“You can’t know until you follow the road until the end. If you’re lucky, there isn’t an end. The road just keeps going. Lesson”
― Elise Sax, An Affair to Dismember

“And this, our life, exempt from public haunt, finds tongues in trees, books in the running brooks, sermons in stones, and good in everything.”
― Elise Sax, An Affair to Dismember