The Gardener Quotes

“Trust is weird,” my mother said. “People give it too easily, most of the time. Because somebody is attractive, they expect him to be good or honest. Or like pushy salesmen—somebody who carefully makes you feel like you’re emotionally obligated to trust them. Like you’re the rude one if you don’t. Trust is really something that needs to be earned. Hard earned. If somebody every says, ‘Don’t you trust me?’ Just say, “No, as a matter of fact.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“I was thinking about his hands on me. Nobody had ever treated me like that. Not ever. But now they had. And how was I ever going to forget it? I would never. I would never.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“Which made me laugh, of course. If you ever want to get truly hysterical, just get really, really scared, and then have somebody say something funny. You get caught between the laugh and the sob, and it’s hard to find your way out.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“There is a difference,” I said stiffly, “between being naive and being innocent.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“He laughed, looking down into his empty cup. “Decent people don’t expect that kind of twistedness.” He put the cup down on the floor. “And if they ever did suspect it, they’d just blame themselves for thinking too mean. You should trust your disquiet the next time. That’s what it’s there for. A man like that gets where he is by seeming. And then he makes you feel obligated to him. It’s an old trick.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“I? Why hadn’t I trusted myself? Because I’d trusted the woman across the street instead, that’s why. That grown up. That Assistant Principal. So in a way, it had been my fault. But in another way, not. But no matter whose fault it was, I still had bruises on my arms. And now, memories I didn’t want.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“Why would I assume that the guy wanted to hurt me when nobody’s ever tried to hurt me before?”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“You coming?” he asked her, leaning in through the door. And then he finally really looked at me. He came to a complete halt—not just his body, but his energy. His eyebrows went right up. “Oh,” he said. I sort of flicked my hem at him, assuming what I fondly considered an enigmatic look. “This okay?” I asked. “Oh,” he said again, stepping inside the house. The screen door hit him when it closed. “Yeah. Yeah, that works.” It kind of looked like he was beginning to sweat.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“Then we were quiet. Quiet isn’t easy. Especially with virtual strangers. They say that nature hates a vacuum, and so it’s kind of natural to want to fill up a human silence with words—any kind of lame words. But there was such a feeling of space around us that my first self-conscious word died long before I ever felt it on my tongue.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“I miss you. You don’t know how much I miss you. You don’t know how my heart sinks inside me when I think how far away you are. But then, maybe you know that feeling. I hope you do. No, I wouldn’t wish that on you. But then, yes I would . . .. Forgive me for missing you that much.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“I’m always buried in something. But I love you. I try to listen to what’s going on. If you need me, just—bring in a bucket of water, or something. Well, not water around the computers. Maybe a cattle prod. No. Not around the computers . . ..” “Ice,” I said. “Down the back.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“And you know what? You can’t make me responsible for you and the choices you make.” I turned around and started walking toward the house.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“She wants me to cut through all the sweetness and light in my head,” I said, “so I can see the truth.” “Which is?” Tommy asked, not turning around. “That nothing is what it seems to be.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“It’s not easy to love someone, but really, really not want anything of what they are to rub off on you.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“I caught a sob before it quite broke, surprised at how quickly it had cut me.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“I walked Sam up to his door and gave him a huge hug. He looked me over in the porch light and leaned over—just a little. He whispered, “You know, I’m glad you wore this costume tonight. Now I know, when you’re fifty three, you’re still gonna be lookin’ good.” So I hit him. Which really wasn’t what I was wanting to do.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“And then I did the stupidest thing I’ve ever done. “They’re not here,” I said. I knew, as the words left my mouth, that I had just made a deep mistake.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“But Sam only grinned at her and said, “Now, don’t you worry about a thing. I promise—I’ll hold your hand tomorrow.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“But here in the open air, this naked, solitary fiddle began a rhythm that played havoc with time, making patterns that set you to moving and told your heart it had been beating the wrong way all your misspent life.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener

“I want to change. I know I could if you give me another chance.” I couldn’t even laugh. He had gone for pitiful and passed right through it to pathetic. “If you want to change, you’ll do it on your own.”
― Kristen D. Randle, The Gardener