Fat Assassins Quotes

“Release the chickens!” All hell broke loose.”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“she liked to collect figurines, read science fiction novels and dreamed of going to Dragon Con”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“The elevating testosterone levels were starting to smother me. I contemplated shooting myself in the leg to get out of it,”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“Wicans”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“I’m not going to get caught running from the devil in heeled boots.”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“Turret's Syndrome”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“When Ulyssa’s mom kicked into guilt overdrive she always overemphasized her Italian accent and started talking about saints. It always worked. If she was in Star Wars, she would have been Darth Guilt.”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“Rochambeau”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“pressed the doorbell.  A male chauvinist door chime echo’d through the house. “Woman, git the damned door. Woman, git the damned door.”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“Dr. Doolittle-Diona Warwick”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“BAM! A squirrel bites a boob!”  We both shuddered thinking about a crazed squirrel swinging by the teeth from our boobs.”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“I still can’t believe there’s a strip club in a town called Pinch,”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“A thin, must’veched man”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“Pabts Blue Ribbon”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“A light breeze snapped the giant ENTRANCE sign taunt”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“Wait. Her best friend slept with her husband, so she divorced him and married her best friend’s husband?” he asked.  “I guess they have rednecks in Switzerland too cause that’s some Jerry Springer stuff,”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“I’m confused. Is she asking me to explain the science of dust bunny procreation? Or is she implying that there was a dust bunny saboteur trying to topple her from power?”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“I looked at Eric hoping he’d intervene before this became a safety report full of shanking and broken hips.”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“I scanned and bagged the boxed wine, duct tape, condoms, chocolates, and denture cream.”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“Buck set two Michelob Lights on the counter.”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“we were paired up for self image affirmation. We spent ten minutes repeating scripted dialogue before we decided we were both very happy with our image.”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins

“Happy Birthday Hooker! Ready to get sideways?” Ulyssa asked”
― Marita Fowler, Fat Assassins