Ocean Beach Quotes

“You should have been in Atlanta right after she got her iPhone and texted all of us her plans to ‘masterbate penis primavera,’” Kyra said, unsnapping Dustin’s bib and scooping him up out of the high chair. Chase snorted with laughter. Maddie could see the curve of Troy’s smile beneath the camera. “It seems clear that people over forty should not be allowed to text,”
― Wendy Wax, Ocean Beach

“she hated that the dress would give the network an opportunity to deduct more IQ points, though why people seemed to think large breasts destroyed gray matter, she didn’t know. Especially when it was clear that men often thought with their penises and bypassed their brains altogether.”
― Wendy Wax, Ocean Beach

“Can I help it if my thumbs are too big for that tiny keypad?” “You should have been in Atlanta right after she got her iPhone and texted all of us her plans to ‘masterbate penis primavera,”
― Wendy Wax, Ocean Beach

“the number of models per square foot here on South Beach was higher than anywhere else in the world and that commercial and film shoots were common.”
― Wendy Wax, Ocean Beach

“I got my first driver’s license in Michigan when I turned twelve.”
― Wendy Wax, Ocean Beach

“We honeymooned on the SS Franklin,” Max said. “We were the onboard entertainment even though it was Millie’s first time onstage. When I saw this house for sale a couple years later, I knew we had to have it.” “It reminds me of the Titanic,” Nicole said under her breath. “Post-iceberg. Assuming it had mowed down a flock of flamingos first.”
― Wendy Wax, Ocean Beach

“The problem began with her height, which was too short to command respect, and was compounded by china-doll features, an oversize bust, and the kind of blue-eyed blondness that caused complete strangers to deduct IQ points and to speak to her slowly. Using really small words.”
― Wendy Wax, Ocean Beach

“Never let them see you sweat. Nicole Grant, former dating guru and A-list matchmaker, knew it was a bad sign when the philosophy you were living by came from a deodorant commercial.”
― Wendy Wax, Ocean Beach