When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha Quotes

“CUTHBERT: No, they didn't warn you about my dancing. They didn't warn you about its sensual power. They didn't warn you that the gyration of my hips is as the gyration of galaxies, that the writhing of my limbs is as the writhing of your most ancient desire. They didn't warn you that to watch me boogie is to hear ancient drums beat an eldritch, irresistible rhythm in the most primal part of your soul. (ASHTON stiffens as CUTHBERT speaks. She turns and grips him with one arm around his waist and one behind his head, and kisses him hungrily.) ASHTON: Please don't do that tonight, in front of Marty and Susan. CUTHBERT: Of course not. An orgy breaking out on the dance floor is fun once or twice, but I've learned there is a terrible price to pay for my powers.”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“ASHTON: Okay, so what do we do with the corpse? CUTHBERT: We could just leave him there. The end is nigh, after all. ASHTON: But he's in the way. We'll trip over him. CUTHBERT: I'll just put him in the closet.”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“CUTHBERT: I don't really know. The Necronomicon doesn't specify. ASHTON: (Mockingly) It doesn't specify? CUTHBERT: It was written over twelve-hundred years ago. It's not The Dummies Guide to Necromancy.”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“I'm starving. I almost took a bite out of this dead Mi-Go on the way back. I hear they taste like mushrooms,”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“You're like a blade of grass worshiping a cow.”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“CUTHBERT: I know. I peeked tremulously between the slats at the hateful sky. A dark beam slipped in and through my pupil and whatever remained of my humanity evaporated in a pathetic puff and sizzle. ASHTON: The same thing happened to me! (ASHTON holds up coffee cup.) But the coffee shop is still open.”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“CUTHBERT: Hey, you wanna prove you're not like my Mom, just give me that drink. ASHTON: I knew I shouldn't hang around the archaeologists, but something about the danger…”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“CUTHBERT: So we're going to sit here and ignore the reason that you've chained me to the bed while Armageddon goes on around us? ASHTON: (Apologetically) I figured we could play checkers?”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“The madness was too… I can't describe it.”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“Could you start the water boiling? I got that fresh pasta you like. After dinner, though, I've got to get down to the temple. We're going to sacrifice a few virgins, you know,”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“CUTHBERT: Oh good Cthulhu… (like "good God") ASHTON: Exactly! I don't chastise you for your involvement in your little cult.”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“I still remember the stink of her breath, like the bottom of an oceanic trench.”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha

“I'd never been there before, and yet nothing looked right. It was as if reality were shifted one millimeter over from what I was seeing.”
― Alan Ryker, When Cthulhu Met Atlach-Nacha