To the Devil, My Regards Quotes

“I’d finally in up in jail for a murder I really did commit.  Amazing how fate can work against us sometimes.  We like the think we’re the center of the Solar System, everything revolving around.  More likely, we’re the center of the vortex when we flush the toilet.”
― Victor Gischler, To the Devil, My Regards

“I twisted my head to look at the girl.  With one hand she held a wide straw hat to her head.  The other held an umbrella drink in a curvy glass.  She wore big movie-star sunglasses, tall, a reddish-new tan.  White bikini bottoms.  No top.  Just boobies. “Uh . . . hi.” “Hi,” she said. Then there was this shirtless fat guy at her side.  He didn’t have a top either, but his boobies were harrier.  He was hot pink with sun burn, wore a new moustache like a smear of brown crayon.  His ball cap said Kiss the Captain.”
― Victor Gischler, To the Devil, My Regards

“The house looked like some gay architect had gotten drunk and watched Gone with the Wind. ”
― Victor Gischler, To the Devil, My Regards

“A waitress who looked like she’d fallen into a vat of Maybelline floated over like an iceberg. ”
― Victor Gischler, To the Devil, My Regards

“This was fishy, and more “old tuna in the heat” fishy instead of “damn good fishsticks” fishy. ”
― Victor Gischler, To the Devil, My Regards