Better Off Undead Quotes

“Most people need a reason to argue - you just need a place.”
― D.D. Barant, Better Off Undead

“Wait", I say. "That's-you-what?"
"That's what I love about working with you, Valchek. Your eloquence."
"But -but- but-"
"And your motorboat impressions."
"Charlie, if you were there, why didn't you arrest him?”
― D.D. Barant, Better Off Undead

“We doing a traffic stop?"
"Yeah. I have a reasonable suspicion that we're witnessing a violation of the law."
"Which law?"
"I'll decide later.”
― D.D. Barant, Better Off Undead

“I'm in position." Charlie's voice, coming through my earpiece.
"Wish I could say the same. All the blood's rushing to my head."
"Thrope stuff?" Charlie sounds a little worried.
"No, I'm upside down."
"Why?"
"I thought it would make me look all cool and ninja-y."
"No one's supposed to be bale to see you."
"Ah. I knew there was a flaw in my plan. Also, i slipped."
"In fact, the whole point of being a ninja is not to be seen."
"Fortunately I have this nifty safety harness, which is why I'm dangling instead of plummeting. Thanks for asking.”
― D.D. Barant, Better Off Undead

“You might think that's selfish of me - and maybe it is - but I am a trained psychologist. No matter how depressed someone is, no matter how deep or unrelenting their pain may seem to be, there's always more to the picture. Situations change. Things get better. The human mind, no matter how stressed, still retains a capacity for joy.”
― D.D. Barant, Better Off Undead