The Duties Of Parents Quotes

“Think too about what the promise contains, before you refuse to take comfort from it. It speaks of a certain time when good training will bear fruit – when a child is old. Surely, there is comfort in this. You may not see with your own eyes the result of careful training, but you don’t know what blessed fruits will spring from it long after you are dead and gone.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“the parent who tries to train without setting a good example is building with one hand and pulling down with the other.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Children’s minds are cast in much the same mold as our own. Sternness and severity of manner chill them and set them back. It shuts up their hearts, and you will weary yourself to find the door. But let them see that you have an affectionate feeling towards them and that you really desire to make them happy and do them good, so that if you punish them, they know it is intended for their well-being. As they see that you, like the pelican, would give your heart’s blood to nourish their souls, they will soon be submitted and devoted to you.[2] But they must be wooed with kindness, if their attention is ever to be won. And surely, reason itself might teach us this lesson. Children are weak and tender creatures, and they need patient and considerate treatment. We must handle them delicately, like frail machines, for fear that by rough fingering we do more harm than good. They are like young plants and need gentle watering – often, and only a little at a time. We must not expect all things at once. We must remember what children are and teach them as they are able to bear. Their minds are like a lump of metal – not to be forged and made useful all at once but only by a succession of little blows. Their understanding is like narrow-necked vessels: we must pour in the wine of knowledge gradually, or much of it will be spilled and lost. Precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little must be our rule (Isaiah 28:10). The whetstone does its work slowly, but frequent rubbing will bring the scythe to a fine edge. Truly, patience is needed in training a child, but without it, nothing can be done. Nothing will compensate for the absence of this tenderness and love. A minister may speak the truth as it is in Jesus – clearly, forcibly, and unanswerably; but if he does not speak it in love, few souls will be won. Likewise, you must set before your children their duty – command, threaten, punish, and reason – but if affection is lacking in your treatment, your labor will be all in vain. Love is one grand secret of successful training. Anger and harshness may frighten, but they will not persuade the child that you are right. If he often sees you lose your temper, you will soon cease to have his respect. A father who speaks to his son as Saul did to Jonathan when his anger was kindled against him and he called him the son of the perverse rebellious woman (1 Samuel 20:30), can’t expect to retain his influence over that son’s mind. Try hard to maintain your child’s affections. It is a dangerous thing to make your children afraid of you. Anything is almost better than reserve and insecurity between your child and you, but hesitancy will result from fear. Fear puts an end to openness; fear leads to secrecy; fear sows the seed of much hypocrisy and leads to many lies. There is a mine of truth in the apostle’s words to the Colossians: Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart (Colossians 3:21). Be sure not to overlook the advice this verse contains.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“If, then, you would deal wisely with your child, you must not leave him to the guidance of his own will. Think for him, judge for him, act for him, just as you would for one weak and blind; but for pity's sake, give him not up to his own wayward tastes and inclinations. It must not be his likings and wishes that are consulted. He knows not yet what is good for his mind and soul, any more than what is good for his body. You do not let him decide what he shall eat, and what he shall drink, and how he shall be clothed. Be consistent, and deal with his mind in like manner. Train him in the way that is scriptural and right, and not in the way that he fancies. If you cannot make up your mind to this first principle of Christian training, it is useless for you to read any further. Self-will is almost the first thing that appears in a child's mind; and it must be your first step to resist it.”
― Mark Hamby, The Duties of Parents

“Fear puts an end to openness of manner; fear leads to concealment; fear sows the seed of much hypocrisy, and leads to many a lie.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents

“Think for him, judge for him, and act for him as you would for any weak and blind person, but for pity’s sake, don’t abandon him to his own wayward tastes and inclinations. His pleasures and wishes must not determine his direction. He doesn’t know yet what is good for his mind and soul, any more than what is good for his body. Don’t let him decide what he will eat, what he will drink, and what he will wear. Be consistent and deal with his mind in like manner. Train him in the way that is scriptural and right but not in the way that he fancies.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way [Updated, Annotated]

“Obedience is the only reality. It is visible faith, acting faith, and personified faith.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Tell them plainly that as long as they are under your roof, it is the rule of your house for everyone in good health to honor the Lord on the Lord’s Day.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Parents, if you love your children, do all that lies in your power to train them up to a habit of prayer.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Prayer is the mightiest engine God has placed in our hands.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Prayer was the distinguishing mark of the Lord’s people since the day that a separation began between them and the world.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Any system of training that does not make knowledge of Scripture its priority is unsafe and unsound.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Train up a child in the way he should go, and He never gave a command that He did not give man grace to perform.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Try hard to maintain your child’s affections. It is a dangerous thing to make your children afraid of you.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“If he often sees you lose your temper, you will soon cease to have his respect.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“A minister may speak the truth as it is in Jesus – clearly, forcibly, and unanswerably; but if he does not speak it in love, few souls will be won.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Children’s minds are cast in much the same mold as our own. Sternness and severity of manner chill them and set them back. It shuts up their hearts, and you will weary yourself to find the door. But let them see that you have an affectionate feeling towards them and that you really desire to make them happy and do them good, so that if you punish them, they know it is intended for their well-being. As they see that you, like the pelican, would give your heart’s blood to nourish their souls, they will soon be submitted and devoted to you.[2]”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Train him in the way that is scriptural and right but not in the way that he fancies.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Don’t let him decide what he will eat, what he will drink, and what he will wear.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Our ministry is unprofitable, and our
labour is vain, till you are brought to your knees.”
― J.C. Ryle, Duties of Parents: In Modern English

“No interest should weigh on you so much as their eternal interests. No part of them should be as dear to you as that part which will never die.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way [Updated, Annotated]

“All of this is one of God’s merciful arrangements. He gives your children a mind that will receive impressions like moldable moist clay. He gives them a disposition at the beginning of life to believe what you tell them, to take for granted what you advise them, and to trust your word rather than a stranger’s. In short, He gives you a golden opportunity of doing them good. See that the opportunity is not neglected and thrown away. Once it slips away, it is gone forever.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way [Updated, Annotated]

“Fear puts an end to openness; fear leads to secrecy; fear sows the seed of much hypocrisy and leads to many lies.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way [Updated, Annotated]

“His pleasures and wishes must not determine his direction. He doesn’t know yet what is good for his mind and soul, any more than what is good for his body.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way [Updated, Annotated]

“Train them in the way they should go and not in the way they would go. Remember, children are born with a decided bias towards evil; therefore, if you let them choose for themselves, they are certain to choose wrong.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way [Updated, Annotated]

“This is a subject that all concerned are in great danger of falling short of in their duty. This is generally a point in which men can see the faults of their neighbors more clearly than their own. They will often bring up their children in the very path which they have denounced to their friends as unsafe. They will see specks in other men’s families but overlook beams in their own. They will be quick-sighted as eagles in detecting mistakes abroad, and yet blind as bats to fatal errors that are daily going on at home. They will be wise about their brother’s house but foolish about their own flesh and blood.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way [Updated, Annotated]

“the vast majority of children are not trained in the way they should go, for when they reach adulthood, they do not walk with God.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way [Updated, Annotated]

“train up your children well – train well for this life, and train well for the life to come; train well for earth, and train well for heaven; train them for God, for Christ, and for eternity.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Fathers and mothers, you may send your children to the best schools, give them Bibles and prayer books, and fill them with head knowledge, but if all this time there is no regular training at home, I fear it will go hard in the end with your children’s souls. Home is the place where habits are formed; home is the place where the foundations of character are laid; and home gives the bias to our tastes and likings and opinions. Be sure then that there is careful training at home.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way

“Strive rather to be a living epistle of Christ that your families can read – and read plainly too. Be an example of reverence for the Word of God, reverence in prayer, and reverence for the Lord’s Day. Be an example in words, in temper, in diligence, in temperance, in faith, in charity, in kindness, and in humility. Don’t think your children will practice what they do not see you do. You are their model picture, and they will copy what you are. They may not understand your reasoning and your lecturing, your wise instructions and your good advice, but they can understand your life.”
― J.C. Ryle, The Duties of Parents: Parenting Your Children God's Way