Snowballs in Hell Quotes

“Really? Then why is it my memories from that time are locked up tighter than a virgin in an iron maiden chastity belt that’s been welded shut?” I had always had a way with words.”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“So if we go through with this, how do we choose a victim?” “Victim?” His brows arched. “Well, aren’t you going to kill him after for having been with me?” It was what I’d do. Don’t judge.”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“And what of you?” At Auric’s foolish question, I snickered. “You’re asking the biggest manwhore if he remembered a possible one night stand, among dozens—” “Hundreds,” my father interjected. “—that created me? Seriously?” “I didn’t know who Muri’s mother was, but she was mine.”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“What have you done to her?” Auric said harshly. “Why does everyone always blame me?” grumbled my father. “Because you’re the devil.” “Good point. And in this case, true.”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“Forbid me again,” I whispered as I maneuvered myself so I straddled his lap. “What am I going to do with you?” “Wicked things.”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“We both know what you’re going to do. You’ll demand I don’t go anywhere alone. I’ll laugh. Maybe mock you. You’ll threaten to spank me.” “I’ll do more than spank you,” Auric growled. “I’m going to chain your sweet ass to this bed.” “Sounds like fun.”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“Just a scratch, but it looks worse. You looked like a bloody corpse.” “A sexy corpse, as in undead vampire or ugly, nasty one like brain-seeking zombie?”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“Hand-to-hand combat provided a great workout, but it wreaked havoc on my cleaning bill. Or if I get dirty enough, I could always go shopping. I’d stolen Daddy’s credit card again, to his delight, which meant I could go shopping until it screamed.”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“Can I ask you something?” I asked my older, and while perhaps not wiser, more male experienced sister. “You can ask me anything, you know that, lamb. What’s up? Your man want you to do something kinky? Tie you up maybe? Spank you?” She recited off a number of naughty things, some which I’d never even heard of, but I’d definitely look them up for future reference. “No, it’s not about sex. It’s this whole overprotective crap. How do I make him see I can take care of myself?” “You can’t,” she said, turning serious.”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“I am not having a fucking orgy. So stop throwing your buddy at me!” Then I was struck by a thought and I poked my head back out of the bathroom and looked at him speculatively. “Are you bi?”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“Apparently he still had fantasies about me though, fantasies that would get him castrated if he didn’t leave me alone. “Get yourself a pocket pussy if you’re that hard up.” Yeah, I knew I was inciting the whole tail pulling thing. What could I say, I thrived on danger. “Bitch, you’ll rue your words when you are mine.”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“Where and how do I get stronger magic?” Ooh, maybe I’d have to go on a quest and find a lost magical artifact. “There”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell

“I sipped the hot java while eyeing with interest Auric’s naked chest while he puttered around the kitchen making us some toasted bagels. I didn’t cook—unless it was trouble. My lover, on the other hand, could, both in and out of the bedroom.”
― Eve Langlais, Snowballs in Hell