Odd Girl Out Quotes

“There is no gesture more devastating than the back turning away.”
― Rachel Simmons, Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls

“Girls may try to avoid being alone at all costs, including remaining in an abusive friendship.”
― Rachel Simmons, Odd Girl Out

“What do I mean by this? The fear of being called "all that" and the demonization of girls who appear assertive or self-satisfied force underground the very behaviors girls need to become successful. Confidence and competition are critical tools for success, yet they break the rules of femininity. Openly competitive behavior undermines the "good girl" personality.”
― Rachel Simmons, Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls

“Teach girls to be aggressive? Well, yes. I return again to a major symptom of girls’ loss of self-esteem: idealized, or conflict-free, relationships. If we can guide girls into comfort with “messy” feelings such as jealousy, competition, and anger, they will be less likely to take them out of their relationships with others. They will feel free to confess strong feelings, and they will stay in touch with themselves. They will be less likely to repress the feelings that over time simmer into rageful acts of cruelty.”
― Rachel Simmons, Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls

“Denying those [negative] feelings locks us away from ourselves and so from authentic relationships with others. Denying those feelings doesn’t make them go away but somewhere else, leaving the people around us unsure of what we mean, who we are, and how we feel. Denying them takes us to a place others sense but do not see. It is a place no girl deserves to be.”
― Rachel Simmons, Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls

“I couldn’t put my finger on it, but eventually I knew: I couldn’t deliver the demon. There was no evil child here, no bad apple. These girls were good people who had done bad things, and for understandable, if not good, reasons. They were not the cold, cunning creatures girl bullies are so often made out to be.”
― Rachel Simmons, Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls