The Book You Want Everyone You Love* To Read * Quotes

“We can’t help but imagine what other people’s attitudes toward us are. But I always say, if you are going to have a fantasy about what someone else thinks about you, make it a good one. It might not change anything, but you’ll be calmer.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love* To Read *

“There are three main styles of coping: thinking, feeling, and doing. If someone you love is going through a difficult time, try to understand what their coping style is and then feel with them rather than trying to deal with it from the start.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love to Read: Sane And Sage Advice to Help You Navigate All of Your Most Important Relationships

“Listening to differences and working through them is about understanding and compromise, not about winning. Rather than damning others with judgments, I think our lives would be better if we remained open with curiosity.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love to Read: Sane And Sage Advice to Help You Navigate All of Your Most Important Relationships

“Be mindful of the language you use with others. A good way to start is to speak in 'I' statements, which define your own experience, and not 'you' statements, which are a judgement on the other person”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love* To Read *

“Manchmal bedeutet authentisch zu sein, dass wir nicht so nett sind, wie wir gern wären. Wenn Ihnen das ein schlechtes Gewissen bereitet, denken Sie daran: Ein schlechtes Gewissen ist besser als Groll.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love* To Read *

“Trying to “win” arguments through facts and logic is unhelpful and pushes everyone into a harmful game of right and wrong. Instead of judgment and victory, try to build understanding and empathy.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love* To Read *

“We often mistake familiarity for truth. Just because we’re used to thinking or feeling in a certain way, it doesn’t mean it’s right.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love* To Read *

“Embrace moments of change not as a frightening unknown but as an opportunity to uncover and pursue your desires. At first it will feel like letting go of a rope and not knowing where the ground is. It can be scary. But more often than not, solid ground is only two inches below your feet.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love to Read: Sane And Sage Advice to Help You Navigate All of Your Most Important Relationships

“It is only when you have given yourself the space to feel the full extent of your feelings that you can calmly describe to others how and why you are angry and open yourself up to seeing things from another point of view.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love* To Read *

“One of the ways to increase wisdom and connection is to speak in the moment and work things out in conversation, rather than thinking we need to have everything right before we speak. This means not filtering all your thoughts: tell someone I want to know you', or try to articulate other scary, self-revelatory thoughts without being certain how they are going to land. You can work out how you feel in relationship with another and not always in your own head. Say things spontaneously. Practise being yourself and being unsure how you'll be received. Dare to share.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love* To Read *

“You can’t really be yourself if you don’t know who that self is. One of the best ways of finding out who you are is in spontaneous conversation with others.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love* To Read *

“Manche Menschen verwechseln Liebe mit etwas, das einen überkommt, dabei ist sie viel mehr. Liebe äußert sich in dem, was wir tun. Liebe ist nicht passiv.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love* To Read *

“Wir alle sind verletzliche Wesen, die lernen müssen, dass man stärker ist, wenn man zu seiner Verletzlichkeit steht, als wenn sich hinter einer Fassade falscher Stärke versteckt.”
― Philippa Perry, The Book You Want Everyone You Love* To Read *