Adventures in Unhistory Quotes

“(Let us reflect, too, upon the possibility, amounting almost to probability, that Stevenson wrote that very book under the influence of medically prescribed cocaine, which was said in those days of its early discovery to cure tuberculosis. And there is yet a paradox in this: first, cocaine does not cure tuberculosis, it does not in fact “cure” anything, it just makes you feel so good that addicts often die of diseases they didn’t know they even had, because they felt so good; and, second, Stevenson, we now know, did not actually have tuberculosis.)”
― Avram Davidson, Adventures in Unhistory: Conjectures on the Factual Foundations of Several Ancient Legends

“Besides not tasting good, the dodo had one or two fateful weaknesses. It laid its eggs upon the open ground, instead of concealing them. And it could not fly. As to why it could not fly—It seems inevitable for it to be said that this was because there were no predators on Mauritius. Indeed there were none either, in Australia, where lived the emu, which could not fly. There were none in New Zealand, where the flightless moa dwelt, in awful ignorance of the awful fact that some day its chief fame would be as an adjunct to the composers of cross-word puzzles. There were no predators in Iceland, to the great comfort of the great auk. Nor were there any on the frozen shelves of Antarctica, land of the flightless penguin.3 However, does this really explain anything?”
― Avram Davidson, Adventures in Unhistory: Conjectures on the Factual Foundations of Several Ancient Legends

“were passed on to later generations in bowdlerized and abridged versions as stories for children. The same happened to Gulliver’s Travels and to Moby Dick, to Robinson Crusoe, to—Children appreciate a good story. They don’t enquire about symbolism or archetypes, and they never read critics.”
― Avram Davidson, Adventures in Unhistory: Conjectures on the Factual Foundations of Several Ancient Legends

“But to get back to the moon, the moon! Ah, the moon! Farmers plant by it, fishermen fish by it, werewolves were by it, bartenders and orderlies in bughouses sigh and shiver at the thoughts of it …”
― Avram Davidson, Adventures in Unhistory: Conjectures on the Factual Foundations of Several Ancient Legends

“Have I sufficiently confused you? Good. Stay humble.”
― Avram Davidson, Adventures in Unhistory: Conjectures on the Factual Foundations of Several Ancient Legends

“Let us say in its favor that though it is nonsense, it is gorgeous nonsense, and it does not lead us down slow cold steps to worship a tyrant in his tomb; and that at least there have never been Unicorn Riots, Unicorn Wars, Unicorn Persecutions, Unicorn Plagues, Unicorn Famines. A scholar in his study studying unicorns will compass no one’s death in the sacred names of Science and Technology. Perhaps we are where we are because we have no more unicorns. Onward.”
― Avram Davidson, Adventures in Unhistory: Conjectures on the Factual Foundations of Several Ancient Legends

“This knowledge of the preservative qualities of honey, at a time when the sugar-cane was unknown in the western world, is no doubt responsible for the fact that the entire body of Alexander the Great was preserved in honey, and viewed by lots and lots of people, some of whom no doubt exclaimed, “Isn’t he sweet!”
― Avram Davidson, Adventures in Unhistory: Conjectures on the Factual Foundations of Several Ancient Legends

“Well, well, sooner or later we shall come to that landmark in almost every Adventure, Pliny the Elder; and so here he is again, bitching as usual; but, as usual, telling us things of great interest.”
― Avram Davidson, Adventures in Unhistory: Conjectures on the Factual Foundations of Several Ancient Legends

“Dragons have generally had a reputation for being anti-social. Liberals may attribute this to a deprived childhood, Conservatives to mere idleness: after all, is that a way to go through life, coiled around some tree?”
― Avram Davidson, Adventures in Unhistory: Conjectures on the Factual Foundations of Several Ancient Legends

“when a couple of members of the Harvard faculty announced all the evidence, Jefferson said, “I would rather believe that two Yankee professors have lied than believe that stones fall from the sky.…” He was a great man. But here he is wrong.”
― Avram Davidson, Adventures in Unhistory: Conjectures on the Factual Foundations of Several Ancient Legends