Ethics of the Real Quotes

“In relation to [ethics as a pursuit of desire], we should mention yet another version of this 'path of passivity', which consists in trying to extort from the Other the 'right answer' . Here, the subject wants the Other to choose for him. For such a subject, the Other always appears in the form of some other person. One could say that this subject aims at elevating some small other to the rank of the (big) Other. The subject spends his life imposing choices upon others, reminding them that they are free individuals who must know what they really want. To take an example: in the case of a love affair that does not suit him any more, such a subject will never break it up, he will delegate this decision to the other. He will play the honest one, he will admit that he is cheating, that he is indeed weak and that apparently he is not up to a real relationship. He will tell the other: 'There, these are the facts, this is how I am, I'm laying myself bare before you - what more can I do? - and now it's your turn to make a decision, to make your choice. ' And if this other decides to leave, she leaves precisely as the (big) Other. We might even say that all the activity of such a subject is leading towards this scene of a miraculous metamorphosis of the other into the Other (who knows what she wants or does not want, and acts accordingly).”
― Alenka Zupančič, Ethics of the Real: Kant, Lacan