Falling for the Jerk Quotes

“So if I giggle, you’ll make me choke on your cock? Not the threat you think it is.” His eyes darken, his lips curling into a wolfish smile. “Fuck, I love your mouth.” “Then take me home, hotshot. I want to use it.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“You told the whole town my pussy is your favorite meal.” “It is, but that’s not what I said.” “Close enough.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“Thanks for the orgasms and living up to all your big dick energy.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“Who am I kidding? If I don’t get my shit together, I’m going to be ass up on his couch with him driving deep into me, over and over, while he commands me to touch myself again.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“What? No piggyback?” I hobble outside. “Don’t baby koalas cling to their mom’s backs, Grace? I’d let you hop on, but you’d have to call me Daddy.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“And because you’re fifteen minutes late, you missed the start. And it’s big. Or I think it was. Gracie? Was it big?”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“But maybe he could be a little prickly. Gruff, but with a heart of gold. A sweet, molten center he’d only allow me to see. He’d be a rough, dominant, pussy-pounding, kitty-devouring god in the sack. Taking me from behind, handling me with confidence and ease. Enjoying every damn bit of me. Whispering what he likes and how he likes it. How good I please him. Mmm…yes, please.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“I’d push her back down to the counter and hold her there, telling her I’ll give her what she needs. If she wants to come, she’ll take my cock like a good girl.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“You’re their beloved town hero and have a face women without standards want to ride, but deep down, I’m sure everyone realizes you deserved it.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“And I buy local with glee, spending more of my paycheck than is reasonable on lattes, books, local wines, and eating out.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“Fine,” I tell him. “Dani’s needed for a small problem in the laundry room—” “It’s a big problem, asshole,” Declan barks at me.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“Jaxon skates out a few feet to face us. “I’m told my best features are my face and as—butt!” he modifies for the younger spectators. “If that helps.” A wide grin pulls at his smug, roguishly handsome face. “Your butt and face look pretty similar, so that checks out,”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“You were biking to work and got into an accident. Then you fainted. Jensen caught you before you hit the asphalt. Scooped you right up, all heroic-like. You’d have hated it, so it’s a good thing you were unconscious.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“Hey, Smalls. You woke up just in time. We’re about to take you on a ride.” “Both of you?” she asks, confused. She lets out a breathy sigh. “My sex dreams have gotten way out of control.” She frowns, eyes closing once more. “So weird. I don’t even like threesomes. My brain must be punishing my vagina for being so damn thirsty.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“I’d like to say this is the first time we’ve had a sex-gone-wrong emergency in Vaughn. But it’s not even the first one this year, and it’s only February. Fucking Fifty Shades of Grey. Ever since the first movie came out, we get at least two calls a year where someone has tried bondage without knowing what the hell they’re doing.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk

“If a vagina could throw a tantrum, mine would need to be dragged out of this bakery kicking, screaming, and holding her damn breath until some brawny, big-dicked hero gave her what she needs.”
― Amy Alves, Falling for the Jerk