Blackouts Quotes

“I’d lost patience for novels. I did not want to die in the middle of a novel. I wanted only endings, last lines, goodbyes, and reunions. I wondered how might things end for me; how would it read, the final sentence of my life? The verdict?”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“And the song is a lament, something camp and bluesy, about how there ain't no shame in being a bitch, but, Lord, be a bitch that barks.”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“Explaining away the “bad father” and redirecting us toward the “good enough father” is so often one of a mother’s covert responsibilities.”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“You see what I’m getting at: wherever there are facts, those facts are embellished, through both omission and exaggeration, beyond the factual.”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“You walk around with this huge fucking neon sign above your head and this arrow pointing down at you, like those signs in front of motels that say rooms available, except your sign says something terrible happened to me, and you keep that sign all lit up like that above you, and you want people to ask, you want the whole fucking world to feel sorry for you, but no matter how much you tell it, no one’s ever going to understand, and it’s never going to be enough.”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow. The way to dusty death.”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“One of the girls says to the kid, “You walk around with this huge fucking neon sign above your head and this arrow pointing down at you, like those signs in front of motels that say ROOMS AVAILABLE, except your sign says SOMETHING TERRIBLE HAPPENED TO ME, and you keep that sign all lit up like that above you, and you want people to ask, you want the whole fucking world to feel sorry for you, but no matter how much you tell it, no one’s ever going to understand, and it’s never going to be enough.”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“He spoke the language, but at us, not with us. You know?”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“Lost time is never found again.”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“Yet the habits of poverty run deep—and I felt, underneath the surface, the same old dread. A constant sense that I’d forgotten to attend to a vague but terrible urgency.”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“And then I felt, or sensed, from the purple black of the soundless sky, that we were in the nethermost opposition of the night, when it’s hard to believe the day will ever break.”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“Do you know why we fetishize, nene? To survive our own ambivalence. Perhaps the chains, and especially the crucifix, became totems, able to absorb both hatred and desire. Perhaps in their glimmer and weight you saw a reflection of all that you wanted, and all that you feared.”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“The point is that every culture has codified ways of expressing overwhelming emotion, panic attacks, nervous breakdowns, ataques de nervios, these are all related to one another. Even in a breakdown, there are cultural codes, behaviors that render the breakdown legible, if not acceptable. You know, I’m sure, the history of the term hysteria?” “I do, Juan. Basically I do. But you said the syndrome is describing something. What then?” “Well, the hysterical reaction, the Hispanic panic, whatever you want to call it, to the increased Puerto Rican presence.” “White People Syndrome?” “Colonizer Syndrome. This is being projected onto Puerto Ricans themselves, and then they are attacked. Surely that’s one thing. And the other is that people living under enormous pressure do sometimes break down, don’t they?”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“I'd lost patience for novels. I did not want to die in the middle of a novel. I wanted only endings, last lines, goodbyes, and reunions. I wonder how mights things end for me; how would it read, the final sentence of my life? The verdict?”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts

“I remember it was autumn, and I remember feeling plagued by an unbearable need for both intimacy and estrangement, for the queerness of touch. Mostly, I placed that ad because I was broke.”
― Justin Torres, Blackouts