Deborah Markus’s Reviews > An Unfortunate Mother's Advice to her Absent Daughters, in a Letter to Miss Pennington > Status Update

Oh, good lord. She just explained to her daughter that if your husband is kind enough not to tell you when he cheats on you, you should appreciate his discretion and know that he's saying silent because he loves and respects you so much.

I know this book is a few hundred years old and divorce was almost impossible, especially for women; but I just threw up in my mouth a little.

When once embarked in the matrimonial Voyage, the fewer Faults you discover in your Partner, the better; never search after what it will give you no Pleasure to find.

Austen had to have read this! It's almost exactly what Charlotte told Lizzy: "It is better to know as little as possible of the defects of the person with whom you are to pass your life."

(Austen said it better, of course.)

When he judges wrong, never flatly contradict, but lead him insensibly into another Opinion, in so discreet a Manner, that it may seem entirely his own, and let the whole Credit of every prudent Determination rest on Him, without indulging the foolish Vanity of claiming any Merit to yourself.

Austen must have read this. Doesn't it sound exactly like Charlotte with Mr. Collins?

The silliest People are usually the most tenacious of their Opinions.

Another keepable quote! I might even make a card out of this one!

The Vanity of those Girls who believe themselves capable of working Miracles of this Kind, and give up their Persons to a Man of libertine Principles, upon the wild Expectation of reclaiming him, justly deserve the Disappointment they will generally meet with; for, believe me, a Wife is, of all others, the least likely to succeed in such an Attempt.

Testify, sister!

So numerous have been the unhappy Victims to the ridiculous Opinion, that a reformed Libertine makes the best Husband, that, did not Experience daily evince the contrary, one would believe it impossible for a Girl who has a tolerable Degree of common Understanding to be made the Dupe of so erroneous a position, that has not the least Shadow of Reason for its Foundation.

We're STILL fighting this idea.

The great Art of pleasing is to appear pleased with others.

Okay, that's a really good quote. (saving)

Talk of the Elegance of a Birth-Day Suit, the Pattern of a Lace, the judicious Assortment of Jewels, the Cut of a Ruffle, or the Set of a Sleeve, with an unaffected Ease.

Calm down. Birthday suits were an actual thing back then, not a euphemism. You could wear your birthday suit to a ball! Everyone would admire it!

Novels and Romances never give yourself the Trouble of reading; though many of them contain some few good Morals, they are not worth picking out of the Rubbish intermixed; 'tis like searching for a few small Diamonds amongst Mountains of Dirt and Trash, which when found, are too inconsiderable to answer the Pains of coming at them.

Oh, dear. Bear in mind this is the section on "entertaining" reading.

Okay, this is getting depressing. Too long to quote, but she's arguing that some female learning is fine, because no matter how much a woman studies, she'll always know that any schoolboy is still more learned than she is. That will keep her humble, and she won't become one of those annoying intellectual women who ruin dinner parties with their talk-talk-talking about, you know, smart stuff.

(sigh)