Shannon’s Reviews > Bullet > Status Update

This book = EPIC FAIL. I'm gonna go pound my head against the wall to try to dislodge this story from my brain.

Ah, ok. Anita is on birth control. She only uses condoms as extra protection. Good. I didn't need another pregnancy scare storyline.

And now begins the major wrap-up that takes all of 3 pages, instead of the 50 or more it should have been afforded.

Hmm. Just realized that the weretiger wasn't wearing a condom. Ruh roh.

So. I really like the new weretiger, even if he has a stupid name. But I'm sure after he's been inside Anita's magical vagina he'll become annoying and whiny. Not looking forward to that.

I went to the sink, unscrewed the top, and started rinsing the cup out. We'd discovered that if you left the drink in the screw-top cups that helped stir them up, you never really got the cups clean. The remains of the protein powder solidified in the cracks and crevices, and you just had to throw out the cup." Because when assassins are after you, the absolute worst thing to come home to is dirty dishes. God forbid

I thought the thought, and then I let it go. I used to hold on to thoughts like that, like hiding dirty clothes under the bed, but now I just let the thought go. I didn't judge it or worry at it; I just thought it and let it drift away.

If he hides, then use dogs. Get some dogs and track the son of a bitch." "Cadaver dogs?" "Every team of dogs needs a flamer with them." "We don't have that many cadaver dogs." "I'll call for the dogs." "The dogs are a good idea. You couldn't do anything but follow the dogs and the flamethrower crew around like the rest of us." Hey, you know what they should get? Some DOGS.

Evil old Uncle Jake," I said. "I couldn't be evil Aunt Anita," I said. "Even to keep her from spreading across the entire world like an evil, death-spreading plague?" "If we do evil in the name of good, it's still evil, Jake." "I can do my duty and not be evil this time." "I know the only thing that keeps giving those kids to you from being evil is your own innate goodness-I can't fit it but the next line has 2 evils

Thank you for bringing back the five-year-old vampire that masturbates to crime scene photos. Now my life is complete.