Jayson’s Reviews > A Clash of Kings > Status Update
Jayson
is 51% done
Thoughts:
(1) I've been at this audiobook for a month, and am only now past the halfway point. I thought it'd be faster, though it's nearly a 1,000 page book, and I guess I'm about as expected.
(2) It's awfully progressive in patriarchal Westeros to have a kings' summit made up of half women.
(3) Renly tells Loras to stay behind to "pray" with him. I assume to get to know each other better... in the biblical sense ;)
— Aug 11, 2019 12:16AM
(1) I've been at this audiobook for a month, and am only now past the halfway point. I thought it'd be faster, though it's nearly a 1,000 page book, and I guess I'm about as expected.
(2) It's awfully progressive in patriarchal Westeros to have a kings' summit made up of half women.
(3) Renly tells Loras to stay behind to "pray" with him. I assume to get to know each other better... in the biblical sense ;)
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Jayson’s Previous Updates
Jayson
is 94% done
Notes:
(1) "After the broth came a salad of apples, nuts, and raisins. At any other time, it might have made a tasty dish, but tonight all the food was flavored with fear."
- I believe it! I've seen "Hell's Kitchen."
(2) "'Drink,' she commanded coldly... 'Your queen commands you!'"
(3) Tywin’s horse takes a dump in the throne room. And here I thought that scene in the show was a blooper. They trained that horse well!
— Sep 06, 2019 12:10AM
(1) "After the broth came a salad of apples, nuts, and raisins. At any other time, it might have made a tasty dish, but tonight all the food was flavored with fear."
- I believe it! I've seen "Hell's Kitchen."
(2) "'Drink,' she commanded coldly... 'Your queen commands you!'"
(3) Tywin’s horse takes a dump in the throne room. And here I thought that scene in the show was a blooper. They trained that horse well!
Jayson
is 87% done
Cersei to Sansa:
(1) "Is your red flower still blooming?... How apt. The men will bleed out there and you in here."
- "Flowering" is truly euphemism of euphemisms.
(2) "Why don’t you just eat your broth like a good girl and wait for Symeon Star-Eyes and Prince Aemon the Dragonknight to come rescue you, sweetling. I’m sure it won’t be very long now."
- Cersei with the hard sass! Channeling her inner wicked stepmother.
— Sep 04, 2019 12:00AM
(1) "Is your red flower still blooming?... How apt. The men will bleed out there and you in here."
- "Flowering" is truly euphemism of euphemisms.
(2) "Why don’t you just eat your broth like a good girl and wait for Symeon Star-Eyes and Prince Aemon the Dragonknight to come rescue you, sweetling. I’m sure it won’t be very long now."
- Cersei with the hard sass! Channeling her inner wicked stepmother.
Jayson
is 84% done
A few things:
(1) Theon gets no respect. His men keep getting murdered by smallfolk, and to top it off, his sister sits in his chair!
(2) Joffrey to Sansa: "'Bless my steel with a kiss.' He extended the blade down to her. 'Go on, kiss it.'"
- Um... Freudian much.
(3) "Let his sword break and his shield shatter, Sansa thought coldly."
- Yeesh... if this is a euphemism, and a shield is what I think it is, that's rough!
— Sep 02, 2019 12:00AM
(1) Theon gets no respect. His men keep getting murdered by smallfolk, and to top it off, his sister sits in his chair!
(2) Joffrey to Sansa: "'Bless my steel with a kiss.' He extended the blade down to her. 'Go on, kiss it.'"
- Um... Freudian much.
(3) "Let his sword break and his shield shatter, Sansa thought coldly."
- Yeesh... if this is a euphemism, and a shield is what I think it is, that's rough!
Jayson
is 83% done
Thoughts:
(1) Catelyn and Jaimie have a sort of Clarice Starling/Hannibal Lecter thing going on: a quid pro quo interrogation.
(2) Catelyn cleverly administers truth serum: a.k.a gives an entire bottle of wine to a thirsty man.
(3) Catelyn: "Gods be merciful, he’s telling the truth... 'Are you trying to deceive me?' Somewhere there was a trap here."
- I mean, what's the point of interrogation if you only expect lies?
— Sep 01, 2019 12:10AM
(1) Catelyn and Jaimie have a sort of Clarice Starling/Hannibal Lecter thing going on: a quid pro quo interrogation.
(2) Catelyn cleverly administers truth serum: a.k.a gives an entire bottle of wine to a thirsty man.
(3) Catelyn: "Gods be merciful, he’s telling the truth... 'Are you trying to deceive me?' Somewhere there was a trap here."
- I mean, what's the point of interrogation if you only expect lies?
Jayson
is 81% done
Notes:
(1) Cersei: "I hope you like blackberry tarts."
Tyrion: "I love all sorts of tarts."
Cersei: "Oh, I’ve known that a long while."
(2) "'Are you unwell, brother?' She leaned forward, giving him a good look at the top of her breasts."
- Desperate times... brother shortage and all.
(3) "Trout wrapped in bacon, salad of turnip greens and red fennel and sweetgrass, pease and onions and hot bread."
- More food lists!
— Aug 31, 2019 12:00AM
(1) Cersei: "I hope you like blackberry tarts."
Tyrion: "I love all sorts of tarts."
Cersei: "Oh, I’ve known that a long while."
(2) "'Are you unwell, brother?' She leaned forward, giving him a good look at the top of her breasts."
- Desperate times... brother shortage and all.
(3) "Trout wrapped in bacon, salad of turnip greens and red fennel and sweetgrass, pease and onions and hot bread."
- More food lists!
Jayson
is 80% done
Notes:
(1) Cersei to Sansa: "'The blood is the seal of your womanhood... You’ve had your first flowering, no more.' Sansa had never felt less flowery."
(2) "They started with a creamy chestnut soup, crusty hot bread, and greens dressed with apples and pine nuts. Then came lamprey pie, honeyed ham, buttered carrots, white beans and bacon, and roast swan stuffed with mushrooms and oysters."
- Again with the food lists!
— Aug 30, 2019 12:15AM
(1) Cersei to Sansa: "'The blood is the seal of your womanhood... You’ve had your first flowering, no more.' Sansa had never felt less flowery."
(2) "They started with a creamy chestnut soup, crusty hot bread, and greens dressed with apples and pine nuts. Then came lamprey pie, honeyed ham, buttered carrots, white beans and bacon, and roast swan stuffed with mushrooms and oysters."
- Again with the food lists!
Jayson
is 78% done
Thoughts:
(1) Ygritte: "Strike hard and true, crow, or I’ll come back and haunt you."
- Burn her too or she'll haunt you either way!
(2) Sansa to Sandor: "Why are you always so hateful? I was thanking you!"
- Oh snap! Sansa getting her sass back! Clapping back at him like he's Arya.
(3) Sansa freaking out after having her first period reminds me of that scene in Carrie, but minus all the laughter and finger-pointing.
— Aug 29, 2019 12:15AM
(1) Ygritte: "Strike hard and true, crow, or I’ll come back and haunt you."
- Burn her too or she'll haunt you either way!
(2) Sansa to Sandor: "Why are you always so hateful? I was thanking you!"
- Oh snap! Sansa getting her sass back! Clapping back at him like he's Arya.
(3) Sansa freaking out after having her first period reminds me of that scene in Carrie, but minus all the laughter and finger-pointing.
Jayson
is 76% done
Thoughts:
(1) Theon's inner commentary is quite a wonder. He walks around Winterfell pointing out how he'd slept with the brewer's wife, the miller's wife, and all these men's wives, all the time wondering why everyone hates him.
(2) "He’d even had two of his own men whipped bloody for raping that kennel girl, to show them he meant to be just. They still blame me for the rape, though... He deemed that unfair."
— Aug 28, 2019 12:00AM
(1) Theon's inner commentary is quite a wonder. He walks around Winterfell pointing out how he'd slept with the brewer's wife, the miller's wife, and all these men's wives, all the time wondering why everyone hates him.
(2) "He’d even had two of his own men whipped bloody for raping that kennel girl, to show them he meant to be just. They still blame me for the rape, though... He deemed that unfair."
Jayson
is 75% done
Thoughts:
(1) Jacelyn: "Prince Tommen is hale and happy, my lord. He has adopted a fawn some of my men brought home from a hunt. He had one once before, he says, but Joffrey skinned her for a jerkin."
- Gee, and I thought pulling heads off Barbies was traumatic!
(2) Varys: “So much villainy, it sings a sad song for our age. Did honor die with our fathers?”
- Seems to me it died with Ned Stark. Much villainy followed.
— Aug 27, 2019 12:00AM
(1) Jacelyn: "Prince Tommen is hale and happy, my lord. He has adopted a fawn some of my men brought home from a hunt. He had one once before, he says, but Joffrey skinned her for a jerkin."
- Gee, and I thought pulling heads off Barbies was traumatic!
(2) Varys: “So much villainy, it sings a sad song for our age. Did honor die with our fathers?”
- Seems to me it died with Ned Stark. Much villainy followed.
Jayson
is 74% done
Musings:
(1) Pyat Pree: "Take and drink."
Daenerys: "Will it turn my lips blue?"
Pyat Pree: "One flute will serve only to unstop your ears and dissolve the caul from off your eyes."
- But does it turn lips blue?
(2) In Qarth visions are scenes of future events, in Westeros they're interpretive. I prefer the latter, it's more fun.
(3) Vote on my next book if you like, thanks: https://www.goodreads.com/poll/show/1...
— Aug 26, 2019 12:15AM
(1) Pyat Pree: "Take and drink."
Daenerys: "Will it turn my lips blue?"
Pyat Pree: "One flute will serve only to unstop your ears and dissolve the caul from off your eyes."
- But does it turn lips blue?
(2) In Qarth visions are scenes of future events, in Westeros they're interpretive. I prefer the latter, it's more fun.
(3) Vote on my next book if you like, thanks: https://www.goodreads.com/poll/show/1...