Sue Child > Status Update

oh and loved heroine's agency at end of ch5

heroine's internal conflict circles, but I think it needs to. I like flawed characters, but usually the flaw connects to the internal conflict, so maybe I'm missing something here.

From a pacing point of view it's deffo holding my interest. Jackie's voice is a good Presents fit. Heroine a bit weak. "Twist" a tad too convenient /too easily got shot of & involves too much suspension of disbelief. I 'm happier to have my disbelief suspended more at the beginning. The hero is deffo in the mould of conflict-driven Presents alpha.

SPOILER not telling the father of your child that he's going to be a father END OF SPOILER isn't a mistake, it really plays it down

Glad that at least the h hasn't lied to her child re "Twist" being his father.

end of ch2 - this one moved quickly, great pace. h redeemed herself slightly. Not sure I like interfering secondary, it makes things convoluted. The circling 'the child is mine' needs to move forward now. Heaven knows how they'll deal with the "twist" plot complication - Sara Craven would already have killed this off having served its purpose Still Sara Craven tone/vibe and love the strong voice

love the passion of this scene, despite heroine's lying, it's a passionate scene which doesn't have its roots in misunderstandings etc...and you know he's right, and you're upset that she can't excuse her action/inaction. She seems unheroinelike and weak here, but I'm still willing to cut her some slack in case we find out more to justify her not telling him, lying etc.

interestingly, the passionate-exchange in this chapter is the excerpt at the end of one of last month's M&Bs.

Surprised only at end of ch1, seems like end of ch2 in my head. Lots of background, but no real dialogue. Classic Presents secret baby trope. Still have unanswered q's about h's potentially unheroic behaviour. Cotswold estate/ Devon stately home, strong, darker voice has bit of Sara Craven vibe / loving this tone

Ah, so the "twist" makes things awkward. Messy. Sara Craven's pulled off this sort of conflict before, but things are...hmm don't want to spoil ...-so things are 'tidied up' before this. This could be tricksy in how it's handled and in terms of h's motivations.