P. Kirby’s Reviews > American Gods > Status Update

I decided that Shadow's ordeal on the tree is a metaphor for reading this book: unnecessarily long, punctuated by pretty hallucinations, but entirely pointless.

"Not only are there not happy endings," she told him. "There aren't even any endings."

After that he had more or less stopped reading. You could not trust fiction. What good were books, if they couldn't protect you from something like that?

Whew! Finally made it to over 500 pages. Only...220 to go. *Glurk!*

I believe in an impersonal god who set the universe in motion and went off to hang with her girlfriends and doesn't even know that I'm alive

Amen.

"Laura."
"Laura. Okay. Well, I hope you don't mind dealing with weirdos. Because they come out at night."
"I'm sure they do. I can cope."

Dead Wife's working the dead shift. *Snort.* Twenty more pages! At this rate, I might finish this doorstop by fall.

Four whole pages read! The "action" consisting of a lugubrious conversation between Shadow and his "dead wife" where dead wife says, "I came all the way from Texas to say 'Hi." And now that I've done that, it's back to Texas." And Shadow says, "Uh-okay."

Riveting. NOT!

In the past 20 pages of so, Shadow has gone for long walks, taken the occasional road trip with Wednesday to meet various peculiar god-spirit persons (meetings happening off-screen), taken more walks, and sniffed the bright, cold winter air. This book is the most over-written thing, like...EVER! ZZZZzzzzzZZZZzzzzZZZZZZZZz..zZZzzzz

Lookie! I've read two whole pages in two days. Somebody get me a cookie. Stat!

Slowest...book...ever.