Sun > Status Update

Amy wrote: "What about Megan's latest statement. Is she still trying to claim she didn't know?

https://www.facebook.com/meganjericks..."

This link is not working. Is this in a group or was it deleted?

Cadiva wrote: "T.J. wrote: "You are absolutely right. I did in January on Twitter. Because I chose to believe SH when he said they were doxxing him. That is completely on me, and I am sorry for that. I have had m..."

Yes, but I should have questioned it more. I only knew about the doxxing allegations, not anything else. However, once I started listening, I saw the things I missed, which is something I should have done from the beginning. The bravery of all of you is remarkable. I am going to bow out of this thread and let other voices be heard. Thanks again.

ME's Twitter:

"...I never intentionally misled anyone..."

IDK, I'm pretty pessimistic right now.

I'm shocked, just shocked.

I'm often too trusting, and have been on the periphery of two catfish incidents in the genre in the past. Though only on the periphery, it still hurt when I found out the truth...
This one wasn't even a blip on my radar because I only knew SH (or ME) by name and hadn't read any of their books.

But reading all your stories, your heartache, your pain, my heart goes out to all of you. No one should be treated like this, should be made to fear speaking up.

THANK YOU!!! for speaking up and making us see.

You have my support.

Thank you to all of you for clearing this up for me. My Mother died of cancer. My Godson's young wife died of a horrible fast killing cancer. That is not anything to lie about. Why can't people just write their fiction stories and leave it us readers to enjoy with no drama. I also have no problem with pen names but the rest is unjustifiable. I to would like to know how much the co-authors knew and if the co-authors really wrote the books. What ever that answer is it makes no difference. SH is persona non grata to my reading library.

I'm so grateful for the authors that came forward with support, especially when it was pre-riptide statement, ESPECIALLY when it meant facing criticism from the "cool kids." Those people were really brave.

However, the women and men who were so brave and posted their stories... wow, true heroes. I don't think I would have had the strength.

Susan, 1,000,000 thanks for starting this thread and empowering the readers to give victims a voice. 1,000,000 thanks to the women on SM who refused to be shut down, even when they were afraid for their families and careers.

I know which authors to now support and which ones to avoid. They have made that all very clear. I've already started deleting reviews here and on Amazon.

You all have moved me greatly.

Amy wrote: "What about Megan's latest statement. Is she still trying to claim she didn't know?

https://www.facebook.com/meganjericks..."

I don't think she has made any other claims on facebook then one already there unless she deleted something recently but this was her 20 hours ago or so on twitter

I don't know what to say. Fead @santinohassell's timeline. I'm feeling a lot of things, mostly that I have only ever been truthful. I have never lied for him, or have any reason to believe he lied to me. But that's that. I'm not interested in fighting.

— Megan Erickson (@MeganErickson_) March 8, 2018

I'm tired. I'm not going to get into how this has affected me emotionally. I'm sorry to readers who are confused or hurt. I'm both of those things as well. All I can say is that I like to write books. I never asked to be dragged into this just by cowriting.

— Megan Erickson (@MeganErickson_) March 8, 2018

If you don't want to read my books because of this, fine. But please stop tweeting me and harassing me. I have nothing to hide. But this is my real name. I have a family. Thanks.

— Megan Erickson (@MeganErickson_) March 8, 2018

I'm going to say this explicitly. If you're involved in this, leave me alone. Forget I exist. Do not tweet or talk about me. I'm done. I have books to write.

— Megan Erickson (@MeganErickson_) March 8, 2018

So one more thing about the situation: I never intentionally mislead anyone. I was trying to be a good friend. I was trying to respect a friend's privacy. And that's on me. This isn't damage control. I don't care about that. I'm just sorry.

— Megan Erickson (@MeganErickson_) March 9, 2018

I know there are some who will still not believe me, and that's okay. And I'm sorry that through me, you met and were hurt by SH. I just... I'm sorry. I am very tired. And I haven't eaten for days. I do have a cat cuddling me tho.

— Megan Erickson (@MeganErickson_) March 9, 2018

I want to say that it's important to keep speaking out about this. Not for revenge. Not for punishment but because we need to keep the next Noah safe. We need to keep the next Jenn safe. We need to keep the next Susan safe and on and on and on. We need to do our best to minimize the possibility of him/her doing this to someone else. This is why i'm glad the M/M group has finally added something about this.

If you don't speak out and spread the word, you make another victim likely. You can't convince everyone, but you can give them the information.

Fabi wrote: "ME's Twitter:

"...I never intentionally misled anyone..."

IDK, I'm pretty pessimistic right now."

I do not believe a word this woman says. She bullied people to go along with the story.

Dani wrote: "I want to say that it's important to keep speaking out about this. Not for revenge. Not for punishment but because we need to keep the next Noah safe. We need to keep the next Jenn safe. We need to..."

I'm so awe of all of you who spoke up and I can't thank you enough for your courage. I've started sharing Nikki's Twitter moment with French readers who were wondering what the fuck was happening - it's not much, but I believe that it's important to keep sharing even though Ryptide terminated him, because people forget or genuinely do not know. I also wrote to the French publisher that translates his novels, no answer so far.

Thank you all, again.

Wow. I'm so embarrassed that I actually gave money to this person. I'll admit I only dived into his books because a favorite author of mine mistakenly defended SH. They've now come to the realization that SH is a horrible human being and have apologized for the posts they made in defense of them. With more and more stories coming to light it's sickening to see how far this person went.

After seeing the bills that were posted, my very first thought was that's some good insurance. I think they misunderstand what people mean when they talk about the weight of their medical bills, because compared to the charges, they paid very little.

Alienor ✘ French Frowner ✘ wrote: "I'm so awe of all of you who spoke up and I can't thank you enough for your courage. I've started sharing Nikki's Twitter moment with French readers who were wondering what the fuck was happening - it's not much, but I believe that it's important to keep sharing even though Ryptide terminated him, because people forget or genuinely do not know. I also wrote to the French publisher that translates his novels, no answer so far.

Thank you all, again. "

Thank you for sharing in French. I've seen some questions, and wanted to answer, but I'm not confident enough in my written French. I'll share your posts.

Thank you to everyone here who spoke up. You are brave for sharing your stories and I'm so sorry to everyone who's been hurt. This whole situation is indefensible.

One way to get him to speak out, contact Nev and Max from MTVs Catfish. Bet they'd love this ;)

Rosalinda *KRASNORADA* wrote: "I haven't even read it yet but I wanted to share a new update

http://santinohassell.com/2018/03/ful...

I admire you all!"

THAT'S TOTAL BULLSHIT!! This so called apology is too little, too late. They knew all along what they were doing/causing to others. They got called out, and now they're trying to back peddle and still play the victims. Don't fall for this shit, y'all.

To all of you ladies and gentlemen, your courage has been an inspiration. You have spoken up and called out loud and clear to be heard. We hear you! We see you! You no longer have to hide. You are standing your ground!

You have my support.

I have been an emotional wreck for several hours and have been unable to coherently put two words together since late last night. Let me start with the easy bits: Susan, you legend I thank you for hosting this incredible post: it re instated some trust in people where there was very little left before.
In the past three years of having to deal with the gaslighting, the ghosting and the emotional fallout of my own dealings with The Man Formerly Known As Sonny - tmfkas(insert TM here) for short - in the confines of my very small group of friends I never thought this day was going to happen. I was certain this was going to stay a dull pain for the rest of my life: a forever regret.
When Elsa and Angela directed me to Nikki's account and asked me what I thought my first instinct was to deny, to even refuse to acknowledge that not only this person had destroyed me at a personal level but that he was also a complete fake. I just could not cope, I refused to listen. But then I started to pay attention and because I have been around tmfkas since 2013 I started to cop the lies. The misrepresentations, the "I never said that" which I knew were fake.
Without beating this horse to death: many know who I am. I am the outcast who dared to criticise the exclusive Patreon. I mean I was spectacularly outcasted I still hear the methaphorical door bang behind me. Man I was hurt, I was so fuckin hurt this person I considered a friend to whom I had given friendship freely not only attacked me, let me be torn to pieces by his sycopanths, he also destroyed me. He destroyed my ability to trust and to make friends. He destroyed my self confidence because surely I was bad if I were cast out, right? Cause that's what your expert manipulators do isn't it? They make you think it is all your fault. I am lucky that I have amazing friends who never faltered: Karen, Aleks, Tara, Miki I'll owe them forever for shouldering me up around that time. It took a full year to get out of the full blown depression that this person triggered with his ghosting and his gaslighting. And I can't even start to tell you all how relieved I am that this has now happened, the feeling of closure, the feeling of no, Fra you are not at fault here, you were not imagining it, you didn't need (we didn't need) to be treated like this! I am so grateful to Susan for this post, I am grateful to Nikki for her relentless exposure of facts and discrepancies, to Angela for her investigator skills and to the #nastybirds for speaking up.
Miki, Karen and I blogged Crossing Lines on March 3rd as a way to show solidarity to these women who were being vilified and dragged all over the place. We had been writing it for almost three years now: it was always too raw, to personal, too intimate, too close to our own hurt and the utter betrayal we had to deal with. And so Nikki thank you not only for exposing this fraud of a scumbag but also for giving us the chance of finally putting it all out in the open. The wound is closing and we are hale because of you all.
I am grateful because on comparing notes - which I bet he banked on us never ever to do so - some old rips are being mended; that we were able to recognise each other 's hurt and mutual experiences for as far back as 2013 and before. He pitted us against each other, bad mouthed each and every single one of us to the others. Jenn, Monica V, Susan you know what I am talking about. The silver lining here is that some bridges can be mended.
I am hale and I am comforted by the show of solidarity to all of us who spoke up but allow me some last thoughts on some of the "apologies" I saw in the last few hours.
Megan Ericson's role in these events is unforgivable! Was she also "duped"? maybe. Do I care? Oh hell no: she systematically abused, enable the abuse and condoned the abuse of me, my friends and everybody else who dared to sing outside the choir. She claims her feelings hurt, that her friend is hurt. Well, Megan you big bully, he was my friend first, I gave my friendship for free and without limitations and he destroyed me and you helped. So no! No redemption arc for you lady!
LA Witt? Was that an apology? or was it a "oh my publisher is pissed let me put a cork in it"? You called Nikki subhuman, where's your apology to her? To all of the #nastybirds? Turns out they are just as human and certainly more ethically convincing that you for sure. So no pass for you either.
Vanessa North also issued a non apology: she laments the loss of a friend but fails to mention the several tweets in which she comforted a notorious bully by claiming to want to fight us all! Also, lady you lost a friend? Come on over, I'll put the kettle on and tell you in excruciating detail how many friends were lost and succumbed to the lies and manipulations of tmfkas.
And has anybody heard from Kade Boheme? He was worried about Nikki's mental health? It'd be nice if somebody let him know that we are all good here. Or Eddie? Eloquent, verbose Eddie who insulted us all, repeatedly and ended up giving us a name? Eddie who for three years has been badmouthing me (and others Miki and Elsa to start with) behind my back? Every time I posted a review, expressed an opinion? A known, vicious bully who is asking people to be nice? Please, no passes for you either.
And yes Riptide made a very clear statement but let's hear it from Sarah Lyons eh? Lets hear her apology to the people she blocked and blacklisted and abused.

And now the final piece, tmfkas himself: the catalyst of so much hurt and heartbreak. I have just read his apology. So, man who I formerly knew as Sonny who are you apologising to?
Your new friends? You had friends and threw us under a fucking bus, we supported you and cheered you on and you ghosted us - boy, it is almost as you intended to completely destroy us.
Are you apoligising to Miki for calling her a "fucking bitch" in public, on your twitter feed? Are you apologising to me for shouting at me when I called you out on the UKmeet subtweets? Or when you shouted at me cause I dared questioning the ghosting? Are you apologising to me for publicly humiliating me and siccing your guard dogs on me while you sat back and let have at me? Or for showing my private emails to people who then repeated them to me word by word (and ah, don't think I have forgotten who these people are - they get no passes either and a warning - I still see you)
Are you apologising to Jenn T for destroying her character? Are you apologising to Susan for the appalling manner you behaved to her: a friend for years, who made you covers and did nothing but help you and confide in you?
You are apoligising because you got caught. Your apologies mean nothing. They are disingenous and false like everything else about you. Your behaviour is appalling and inexcusable and pointless so fucking pointless. You had the talent why bury that under so many lies!

I am glad it is all finally out, I really am. It is like I have shed a ton of lead off my shoulders.
(this is probably more emotional then I intended it to be but eh fuck it I am emotional so there.)

Considering that all identifying information has been blocked out of the medical documents, they could belong to anyone.

Brad Vance also posted a pretty accurate breakdown of SH's "apology":
https://www.facebook.com/brad.vance.1...

Don't forget that he still has contracts with Intermix/Berkeley/ Penguin for the Barrons series and another one for a m/f series about a single dad. I don't remember who that's with but I'll do some digging. Please email those publishers too. The level of abuse that went on is horrifying and these types of abusers don't stop. They just find new victims. He's playing up the sympathy card in his Patrone, fans are upping their financial support. He also started a private, locked twitter. He'll only let "select, special" people join that. They'll feel like they've been singled out because they are good and important and the whole thing starts all over again. They'll just be better at covering their tracks this time.

Tamara (緑) wrote: "Brad Vance also posted a pretty accurate breakdown of SH's "apology":
https://www.facebook.com/brad.vance.1..."

BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!! This needs to be blasted all over the place<3

As aftermath of this Shamtino mess, I have shortened more than what I already had my GR friends and followed persons lists, deleting from then readers/writers well known due their aggressivity and contemptuousness towards those who don't agree with them with blindn loyalty .

Addenda: I forgot tu say that the three "subjects" of elimination on my list today have been named or alluded in this thread and two of them are on the mainl cast of this iniquitous behaviour.

I am particularly worried about the third of the bunch with which I interacted enough and who I supported without too many questions. Well, I started to question myself and I eliminated from all my social nets those people who have proven -to my eyes- to be hurtful and toxic

These situations cause one to stop and realize that good fights start within oneself. Then, II have to examine my actions if I want to have a better community, a better society, a better world.

I'm not personally aggressive, I don't insult, I don't denigrate, but if for a badly understood loyalty I celebrated or supported -even with a "Like"- aggressions and any type of bullying, I feel that's imperative that I apologize.

This apology, although general in its reach, I do it with someone particular in mind, (I have not seen this person in this thread so I will not say their name), someone who only had kind attitudes towards me. This person overnight put their profile completely private, unfriended me and didn't answer my PM asking why; the cause I supposed it when, few days later, I found vitriolic comments from the above mentioned reviewer attacking this person, a gentle soul of which I never read anything insulting or aggressive.

So, XXXX, if you are reading this I want you to know that my apology is given with you in my mind and my heart. I'M SORRY, from the bottom of my heart, if in any way -even with my silence- I contributed to bully and to hurt someone.

I hope that if these horrible behaviors are repeated in the future, from this long and painful path that has been for Jenn, Noah, Nikki, Francesca, Miki, Susan and other victims of SH and their cruel entourage, I'll have learned to have a more critical look, less tolerance to abuse of any kind and a quicker and more determined voice to raise it in defense and denunciation.

Another author who supported the victims is Ajax Bell

I feel terrible for what Noah and Jenn had to go through, if there are now two opening up about SH’s sexual predator behavior, there are bound to be more. This is the absolute lowest of the low!

The more I’ve read in these past few days, the more in awe I am of the courage and perseverance of Nikki who never let up on her mission to get the truth out and who had to wait so long and endure so much to be heard. There have been some important voices this week, including Susan who started this thread, that collectively got the ball rolling in the right direction. Thanks to all of you!

As for SH’s pics of medical bills, that proves nothing. Getting a test done doesn’t mean there was a positive diagnosis of whatever got tested.

Francesca wrote: "I have been an emotional wreck for several hours and have been unable to coherently put two words together since late last night. Let me start with the easy bits: Susan, you legend I thank you for ..."

Jesus F Christ!
This hurts so much :'-(
You left me in tears.
I am so so sorry, Francesca :(

Francesca wrote: "LA Witt? Was that an apology? or was it a "oh my publisher is pissed let me put a cork in it"? You called Nikki subhuman, where's your apology to her? To all of the #nastybirds? Turns out they are just as human and certainly more ethically convincing that you for sure. So no pass for you either.."

AMEN! That is what I call 'covering her arse'

I still don't see proof. Of anything. No doubt this will make me a target ... but why are people on this thread bullying authors instead of just listening to victims? When I google this topic .... I'm not finding much. So, I see all this angry mob waving around words like they are pitch forks.

If someone was hurt that is bad. But, I don't understand what was done to whom or by who. I see a lot of people going "oh yeah I researched... and found... yuck..." but nothing is provided to explain what was found etc....

Judging is obviously the way to go in this discussion without being willing to hear someone's reasonable questions. Questions that were logical and sincere (see the first few pages of this thread). I don't get it. If people were harassed that is wrong. But, I have never seen any of the harassment until this thread where authors are being harassed by supposed fans.

I also don't understand trying to erase someone off the planet, which is what this thread has turned into. I doubt I will be buying books from either Dreamspinner or Riptide now because of their actions without any real explanation makes it all seem like censorship.

I buy a book for the story, not for the person behind the story. And for this venue to turn into hate mongering really makes very sad.

The truth is often not fully realized, especially when you will only see/hear one side's view.

Sorry, I wanted to add that cat fishers often don't stop. They'll go away for a while and once some time has passed and the dust settled another author/artist/creator etc will pop up under a new identity, a whole new slew of victims theirs for the picking.

I was reminded of this just a couple of months ago when a friend on FB notified me that the cat fisher we came across in the QAF fandom YEARS ago 2001/2 - Gage, who pretended to be a married gay man with kids (he played the part of the husband, Shan too) but who was really Rebekah, Lasha Lee and goodness knows who else, was still cat fishing on a subreddit forum!

The point is, I'll be staying more vigilant than I have recently while participating in fandom, be it movie, book, TV show etc and I hope everyone else will too. These people make my blood boil.

Jann wrote: "I still don't see proof. Of anything. No doubt this will make me a target ... but why are people on this thread bullying authors instead of just listening to victims? When I google this topic .... ..."

Since the proof has been posted all over nikki's twitter account (which has been linked here several times) & the testimonies of SH's abusive behavior were posted all over this thread and anonymously over at Sakura's twitter account, I am going to assume you are willfully ignorant.

Jann wrote: "I still don't see proof. Of anything. No doubt this will make me a target ... but why are people on this thread bullying authors instead of just listening to victims? When I google this topic .... ..."

One more time then:
https://twitter.com/ease_dropper
Scroll to the bottom and read from the beginning. Then take into account that Riptide and DSP would not just willy-nilly stop a working relationship with an author 'just because'...

And if that's not enough for you, with EVERYTHING else in posts and comments and testimonials, I will just say: you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink.

Alisa wrote: "Don't forget that he still has contracts with Intermix/Berkeley/ Penguin for the Barrons series and another one for a m/f series about a single dad. I don't remember who that's with but I'll do som..."

How do you take down a slippery eel like that? Breaking cult mentality has always been as tough as a cement wall.

I'm not really in this world anymore, but I want to say to everyone who gave of themselves and got used that Kindness and Empathy are Virtues, Never Let Anyone Make You Feel Ashamed of Them.

Jann wrote: "I still don't see proof. Of anything. No doubt this will make me a target ... but why are people on this thread bullying authors instead of just listening to victims? When I google this topic .... ..."

There's none so blind as those who cannot see.

There's plenty of evidence out there, if you choose not to believe it, that's on you.

Robin Covington has made a statement regarding removing SH's work from the EXPOSED anthology:

https://www.facebook.com/RobinCovingt...

I don't know if she's been mentioned here, but Anyta Sunday also shared Ajax Bell's thread about believing victims : https://twitter.com/anytasunday/statu... She also shared KJ Charles's.

Francesca wrote: "I have been an emotional wreck for several hours and have been unable to coherently put two words together since late last night. Let me start with the easy bits: Susan, you legend I thank you for ..."

At the end, everybody saw the truth :)

Thank you for this thread Susan, and thanks to everyone who has spoken up (and huge hugs and support to those whose personal stories, personal pain, and intimate lives were used and abused, particularly Noah and those with stories like his.)

I've never had anything to do with SH, beyond reading perhaps 2 of their books. I plan to remove any reviews and link the Riptide statement in them instead.

I am so sad to see this kind of pain roll through our community again, and even more to see how many people are sharing stories about so many other catfishers and abusers from their pasts, in a host of venues. The openness of people's hearts and the trust we give to each other are one of the most precious gifts of being human, and the abuse of trust for selfish ends one of the most awful acts.

I'm not sure there's anything I can offer that helps, except to amplify voices. My gratitude to anyone who speaks out against abuse, in any context, and who refused to be part of silencing victims. You make the world a better place.

Hi, everyone. I've been following all of this since yesterday and I can’t thank you enough for your courage. I’m in awe of you all. I just wanted to say that here, in Brazil, we are listening too.

Jann wrote: "I still don't see proof. Of anything. No doubt this will make me a target ... but why are people on this thread bullying authors instead of just listening to victims? When I google this topic .... ..."

Really? Fo' real, really?
=======================

Tamara (緑) wrote: "Since the proof has been posted all over nikki's twitter account (which has been linked here several times) & the testimonies of SH's abusive behavior were posted all over this thread and anonymously over at Sakura's twitter account, I am going to assume you are willfully ignorant."

THIS!

I've taken my time today reading this thread and Noah and Jenn's stories plus the other anonymous ones on Sakura's twitter, I am so hurt and pissed.
But I wanna give a shoutout to Nikki who suffered bullying and harassment for so long but never stopped. To all the other nasty birds that raised their voices and made us hear and unite.
I am so incredibly proud of (almost) everyone on this thread because you were willing to listen and you defended people that didn't know what to do.

I really hope that this shit helps to really unite this community and learn to respect other's even if we don't share opinions on books because we just witnessed here how giving a bad review turned to hell for some people.
Let's respect and protect each other. much love everyone, I hope we can continue sharing books.

I know that people on the outside think that we are the bullies, that we want to destroy this person, but all we want is for the scam and the hurt to stop.

Like Dani Alexander said, let's keep the conversation going so this shit doesn't happen again.

I promised myself I wouldn't comment further, while still supporting everyone who's come forward with their own stories,
because my own pales in comparison.

Ah, fuck it. Tez wrote: "Vanessa North's statement: http://facebook.com/vanessa.north.754...

I'm side-eye..."


That statement doesn't indicate any remorse for the viciously untrue tweets made on Twitter about a reviewer from a blog making an unwanted sexual pass at her when I have a receipt of her stating to me that pass was made by an author.

With any of these so-called apologies made by the people in the abuser's inner circle - focus less on yourself and more on the people the abuser harassed, maligned, and nearly destroyed in their years-long rampage. Apologize to THEM. You fueled the abuse, with your white-knighting, with your silence, with your denials of the overwhelming evidence.


edited for typos.

Sakura wrote: "Robin Covington has made a statement regarding removing SH's work from the EXPOSED anthology:

https://www.facebook.com/RobinCovingt..."

Oh this pleases me because I've had that on pre-order for months.

Francesca wrote: "I have been an emotional wreck for several hours and have been unable to coherently put two words together since late last night. Let me start with the easy bits: Susan, you legend I thank you for ..."

Look at you preaching the gospel today my darling. We will always stand beside you so that you know you are never alone. If one good thing came from that Patreon blog post, it was that it’s where I knew you saw through the bullshit too.

Sandra wrote: "I promised myself I wouldn't comment further, while still supporting everyone who's come forward with their own stories,
because my own pales in comparison.

Ah, fuck it. Tez wrote: "Vanessa North..."

BRAVO, Sandra! Thank you!

Jann wrote: "... but why are people on this thread bullying authors instead of just listening to victims? "

Oh, sheesh, here we go again. No one on this thread is bullying authors. Apparently you have no clue what bullying actually is.

Even if everything being said here is untrue (and I'm not saying I think that), it still wouldn't be bullying or harassment.

And from what I've seen people are listening to victims.

"But, I have never seen any of the harassment until this thread where authors are being harassed by supposed fans."

I'm sure this will fall on deaf ears, but authors are not being harassed on this thread. The author(s) are not HERE. It's simply not possible to harass a person who isn't even present.

"I buy a book for the story, not for the person behind the story. "

That's great, do that. No problem. Other people actually care where their money goes when they purchase a book, and what that money is supporting and encouraging. If you don't care or want to know, or whatever, that's perfectly fine. However you feeling that way doesn't obligate every other single reader on the planet to do likewise in every single situation, regardless of what it is.

I've kept quiet while this thread has unfolded over the last few days, partly because I didn't want to believe it, and partly because I've shared stuff with SH that I've never said to anyone else and frankly was scared of what they'd do if I planted my flag in the enemy camp.

When navigating the tensions between all my GR friends got to the point that GR became uncomfortable, I ditched my old account and came back with a new one and deliberately kept my distance from the m/m community.

I probably would still be silent, if not for reading Noah's story this morning. omg. I remember you Noah, we never interacted much, but I remember when you appeared on GR and when you disappeared.

The lies about "himself", BS about Susan, and most of all Jenn. Others who I won't name because I haven't seen them name themselves.

My own hurt feelings are nothing compared to what SH did to many of you.

I just want to say I'm so sorry to those of you whose pain I in any way contributed to, either through my own actions, repeating SH's lies, or just turning my back.

f.k.a. weasel

Daniel wrote: "I've kept quiet while this thread has unfolded over the last few days, partly because I didn't want to believe it, and partly because I've shared stuff with SH that I've never said to anyone else a..."

<3 I'm glad you're here, Weasel. I know it comes at great risk considering how private you are and how Sonny would use our personal info as a weapon to keep us silent. You're not alone.

Jaime wrote: "Here is a full apology from SH http://santinohassell.com/2018/03/ful..."

The sheer mendacity on display in that "apology" is staggering to behold. Side-stepping, deflection, misdirection, pity plays, evasion -- Wow. If I'd had any lingering doubts, this slick, manipulative, self-serving excuse for an apology would have laid them right to rest.

While I myself had personal, private and ultimately very painful dealings with SH back in the 2014-2015 timeframe, they’re nothing in comparison to what I’ve been reading from others these past few days. Hugs to everyone for your bravery in coming forward, and your compassion for others who are hurting. I’m in awe of every single one of you.

What I want to do here—need to do—is apologize to the ones I’ve hurt, the ones I allowed him to use me as a tool against back then. Jenn and Alissa, you were my friends, and when it came down to making a choice, I chose him. For that I’m deeply, truly sorry. There are no words for how much I regret enabling his unspeakable cruelty toward you both.

Susan...can you hear me? You might want to consider publishing your SH story on McSweeney's Internet Tendency (link:)

https://www.mcsweeneys.net/

...the site of the SF based publisher.

Cheers, Michael Ampersant

Dani wrote: "<3 I'm glad you're here, Weasel. I know it comes at great risk considering how private you are"

what happens, happens. I'll survive if it comes to that. short term pessimist, long term optimist. :)

Melanie wrote: "While I myself had personal, private and ultimately very painful dealings with SH back in the 2014-2015 timeframe, they’re nothing in comparison to what I’ve been reading from others these past few..."

OMG you have no idea what this means to me... I really believed even if everything worked out I would still be hated and ostracized.

But I'm no saint either... I made some poor choices. And the worse thing of all... hurting someone you and I both cared about deeply. There is not a day that goes by that I don't regret what I did. I plan on reaching out, not to ask for forgiveness, I don't deserve it, but to say I'm sorry.

Thank you, Mel. I hope we can chat soon. Catch up. Put this behind this. I feel like I'm at a family reunion or something.