Sara J. (kefuwa)’s Reviews > A Visit from the Goon Squad > Status Update

- those old mechanical metaphors that have nothing to do with how information travels. See, reach isn't describable in terms of cause and effect any more: its simultaneous. It's faster than the speed of light that's actually been measured. So now we study particle physics." "What next? String theory?" "That's an elective."

But where? Ted deliberated this question while drowning three espressos in the hotel lobby, letting the caffeine and vodka greet in his brain like fighting fish.

"I picture it like Judgement Day," he says finally his eyes on the water. "We'll rise up out of our bodies and find each other again in spirit form. We'll meet in that new place, all of us together, and first it'll seem strange, and pretty soon it'll seem strange that you could ever lose someone, or get lost."

"Oh we'll know each other forever," Bix says. "The days of losing touch are almost gone" "What does that mean?" Drew asks. "We're going to meet again in a different place," Bix says. "Everyone we've lost, we'll find. Or they'll find us." "Where? How?" Drew asks. Bix hesitates, like he's held this secret so long he's afraid of what will happen when he releases it into the air.

You've entered a state of tingling, stomachy happiness that feels the way you hoped adulthood would be as a kid: a blur of lost bearings, release from the drone of meals and homework and church and 'That's not a nice way to talk to your sister, Robert Jr.

In high school you'd get in fights when you felt like this, but no one will fight with you now - the fact that you hacked your wrists with a box cutter three months ago and nearly bled to death seems to be a deterrent. It functions like a force field, paralysing everyone in range with an encouraging smile on their lips. You want to hold up a mirror and ask: How exactly are those smiles supposed to help me?

That afternoon, I lay on my bed and closed my eyes and saw a burning heart suspended in darkness, shooting off light in every direction. It wasn't a dream, because nothing happened. The heart just hung there.

I looked down at the city. Its extravagance felt wasteful, like gushing oil or some other precious thing Bennie was hoarding for himself, using it up so no one else could get any. I thought: if I had a view like this to look down on every day, I would have the energy and inspiration to conquer the world. The trouble is, when you most need such a view, no one gives it to you.