Nautica Western’s Reviews > To Kill a Kingdom > Status Update

I’m realizing now the emphasized thinness is a result of her turning into a human, but… why? My evil mother made me a human &, perhaps for unrelated reasons, made me super skinny?? I feel like she would’ve been weakened enough without losing 30 lbs

No trust in readers’ ability to perform even a smidge of critical analysis. Don’t worry, no need to think or form opinions. Christo is going to spell it out for you— word for word, right on the page!

“a belt as thick as either of my legs” oh perfect so either you should’ve called it a corset or the sea-dwelling creatures who should by all logic rely on fat stores are stick-thin. Naturally

Allergic to naming characters. How many times will we just call him “the assistant engineer”

“Ice kingdom” “snow sea” are you 11 years old?!

Self-harm by jellyfish sting. What are we doing

And another thing! I’ve called Rebecca Yarros’ delivery of exposition in Fourth Wing lazy, but it is Shakespearean compared to this. They’re just saying it, longwindedly and for no reason pertaining to what is actually going on. Like okay, thanks?

If you’re going to take on the challenge and adventure of writing water-dwelling creatures, I think it would be prudent to pay more mind to the physics involved.
Also, these descriptions are so basic. Where is my immersion??

Guys… I’m really trying, here. The writing is unremarkable (to be more clear, it feels elementary level). I’m already underwhelmed by the world-building. My hopes were not that high, to be honest, but I was intrigued! I love an aquatic fantasy. I love a siren/pirate romance. But we can’t just keep publishing anyone with a kindle.