Imalah ’s Reviews > Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex > Status Update
Imalah
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“Repressed” is the opposite of “liberated.” An insult. In culturally liberal circles, the sexually conservative woman is often considered to be sexually repressed—and the sexually repressed woman is a symbol of a time before freedom. She is uptight and in denial, white-knuckling her way through life. She is the perfectly coiffed fifties housewife, lacking the ease of liberated counterparts who are in touch with their
— Jul 19, 2026 12:14AM
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Jul 19, 2026 12:15AM
bodies and secure with their place in the world. The sexually repressed woman is an object of pity and a reminder of the importance of progress. She is embarrassing. I believed all of the assumptions embedded in this archetype of the woman who doesn’t embrace sex: that she is prudish and prim, that she hasn’t done the proper work of liberating herself from shame, and that she is politically conservative too. None of this aligned with my goals. The words used to describe women who didn’t have sex (celibate, abstinent, pure, chaste) seemed either clinical or moralistic in a way I disdained. The words used to describe women who did (free, empowered, bold) I liked and wanted to apply to me. I absorbed the language of archetypes and aesthetic tropes—the repressed woman, the liberated woman—instead of thinking more critically about whether these stories were true and, if so, what they might imply about how we connect sex and politics and power."
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