Dylan Whitlock’s Reviews > Thanks for the Feedback: The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well > Status Update

“A feedback giver may not be ready or able to acknowledge their contribution to the problem…Rather than trying to force them to admit to and take responsibility for their part in the problem, describe how they could get a better reaction from you.
You're asking them to change, but you're casting it (legitimately) in service of helping you change.”

I really liked this point

Look at the full system rather than the individual

Blame absorbers vs blame shifters (speaks for itself) can be another relationship trigger for why it’s harder to take and give fb to those around us

Feedback from Relationships:

We can be triggered by feedback to those around us or close to us depending on how we view the person or how we feel they treat us.
Relationship triggers can sometimes lead to "switchtracking" where two separate feedback topics are brought up, but you can use "signposting" to separate and address them both. Relationship issues can sometimes lurk underneath the feedback first given

This chapter discussed blindspots:

they are amplified by emotional math, attribution, and impact-intent gap

In order to see ourselves and our blindspots, we need to ask those around us for help (honest mirror)

The MIT Human Dynamics lab developed electronic badges and apps that gathered data on how people interacted with each other throughout the day. It tracked tone, pitch, pace, gestures, and other nonverbal cues. MIT was able to predict successful or unsuccessful interactions/outcomes just using these signals and it has been used to help those with autism see and understand social cues (I found this interesting)

INTERESTING:
Superior Temporal Sulcus (STS) is responsible for interpreting others' voices and words but turns off when we speak! This is thought to be the main reason why we don't hear the tone of our voice the way others do

Blind Spot: something others see about us that we don't see
Blind spots are often behavior or facial expressions/body language