Figgy’s Reviews > Project Hail Mary > Status Update
Figgy
is on page 375 of 476
“Um…” I say. “Rocky, you can make screws, right?”
“Yes. Easy. Why, question?”
“I dropped one.”
“Hold screws better.”
“How?”
“Use hand.”
“My hand’s busy with the wrench.”
“Use second hand.”
“My other hand’s on the hull to keep me steady.”
“Use third han—hmm. Get beetles. I make new screws.”
“Okay.”
— 10 hours, 51 min ago
“Yes. Easy. Why, question?”
“I dropped one.”
“Hold screws better.”
“How?”
“Use hand.”
“My hand’s busy with the wrench.”
“Use second hand.”
“My other hand’s on the hull to keep me steady.”
“Use third han—hmm. Get beetles. I make new screws.”
“Okay.”
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Figgy’s Previous Updates
Figgy
is on page 422 of 476
He bounces back and forth some more. “Erid will live! Earth will live! Everyone live!” He curls the claws of one hand into a ball and presses it against the xenonite. “Fist me!”
I push my knuckles against the xenonite. “It’s ‘fist-bump,’ but yeah.”
— 6 hours, 33 min ago
I push my knuckles against the xenonite. “It’s ‘fist-bump,’ but yeah.”
Figgy
is on page 421 of 476
“Eridians need water, too, you know.”
“We keep inside. Closed system. Some inefficiencies inside, but we get all water we need from food. Humans leak! Gross.”
I laugh as I float into the lab where Rocky is waiting. “On Earth, we have a scary, deadly creature called a spider. You look like one of those. Just so you know.”
“Good. Proud. I am scary space monster. You are leaky space blob.”
— 6 hours, 45 min ago
“We keep inside. Closed system. Some inefficiencies inside, but we get all water we need from food. Humans leak! Gross.”
I laugh as I float into the lab where Rocky is waiting. “On Earth, we have a scary, deadly creature called a spider. You look like one of those. Just so you know.”
“Good. Proud. I am scary space monster. You are leaky space blob.”
Figgy
is on page 409 of 476
I strap myself into my bunk. A pillow tries to float away, but I snag it in time and wedge it under my head. I’m all wired up, but if I don’t go to sleep soon, Rocky will start hassling me. Sheesh—you almost ruin a mission one time and all of a sudden you have an alien-enforced bedtime
— 7 hours, 52 min ago
Figgy
is on page 407 of 476
I shrugged. “Ships have names.”
He points to my pilot’s seat. “What is name of you chair, question?”
“It doesn’t have a name.”
“Why does ship have name but chair no have name, question?”
“Never mind. Your ship is the Blip-A.”
“That is what I said. Flash in ten seconds.”
“Copy.”
2/2
— 7 hours, 57 min ago
He points to my pilot’s seat. “What is name of you chair, question?”
“It doesn’t have a name.”
“Why does ship have name but chair no have name, question?”
“Never mind. Your ship is the Blip-A.”
“That is what I said. Flash in ten seconds.”
“Copy.”
2/2
Figgy
is on page 407 of 476
“Hey. What’s is your ship’s name, anyway?”
“Blip-A.”
“No, I mean, what do you call it?”
“Ship.”
“Your ship has no name?”
“Why would ship have name, question?”
1/2
— 7 hours, 57 min ago
“Blip-A.”
“No, I mean, what do you call it?”
“Ship.”
“Your ship has no name?”
“Why would ship have name, question?”
1/2
Figgy
is on page 403 of 476
“This is waste of time. Also waste of my food.”
“I need to know if I can eat your food.”
“Eat your own food.”
“I’ve only got a few months of real food left. You have enough aboard your ship to feed a crew of twenty-three Eridians for years. Erid life and Earth life use the same proteins. Maybe I can eat your food.”
“Why you say ‘real food,’ question? What is non-real food, question?”
— 8 hours, 20 min ago
“I need to know if I can eat your food.”
“Eat your own food.”
“I’ve only got a few months of real food left. You have enough aboard your ship to feed a crew of twenty-three Eridians for years. Erid life and Earth life use the same proteins. Maybe I can eat your food.”
“Why you say ‘real food,’ question? What is non-real food, question?”
Figgy
is on page 398 of 476
“Why, question? Why no wait, question?”
He’s completely right, of course. I’m risking my life and maybe the structural integrity of the Hail Mary. But I can’t just sit around for eleven days when there’s so much work to do. How do I explain “impatience” to someone who lives seven hundred years?
“Human thing,” I say.
“Understand. Not actually understand, but…understand.”
— 8 hours, 55 min ago
He’s completely right, of course. I’m risking my life and maybe the structural integrity of the Hail Mary. But I can’t just sit around for eleven days when there’s so much work to do. How do I explain “impatience” to someone who lives seven hundred years?
“Human thing,” I say.
“Understand. Not actually understand, but…understand.”
Figgy
is on page 395 of 476
I’ve known for a while that I’m not the best hope for saving mankind. I’m just a guy with the genes to survive a coma. I made my peace with that a while ago.
But I didn’t know I was a coward.
— 9 hours, 12 min ago
But I didn’t know I was a coward.
Figgy
is on page 386 of 476
“What about other candidates on the list? The ones that didn’t make the original cut?”
“There’s no one as qualified as you. Frankly, we’re lucky—lucky beyond our wildest dreams—that you happen to be coma-resistant. Do you think I kept you on the project for so long because I needed a junior high schoolteacher around?”
“Oh…” I said.
— 10 hours, 37 min ago
“There’s no one as qualified as you. Frankly, we’re lucky—lucky beyond our wildest dreams—that you happen to be coma-resistant. Do you think I kept you on the project for so long because I needed a junior high schoolteacher around?”
“Oh…” I said.
