Status Update

Elizabeth is 75% done

Stomping on the phone to destroy it is dumb. Just turn it off. They can't ping anything if it has no battery! Change the SIM. Also, call from a fricking payphone or some other person should call like Dodge!

— Feb 05, 2026 08:43PM

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Elizabeth’s Previous Updates

Elizabeth is 66% done

Uh, how do you think he's unrecognizable when a week ago he was recognized in the same clothes!?

— Feb 05, 2026 07:36PM

Elizabeth is 57% done

Healing injuries takes two weeks. Not three days.

— Feb 05, 2026 05:23PM

Elizabeth is 45% done

I don't believe anyone would recognize him that quickly. Nor that they would immediately call the police. Nor that the police would respond so quickly.

— Feb 05, 2026 07:33AM

Elizabeth is 44% done

Author, nachos do NOT have strings of cheese.

— Feb 05, 2026 07:20AM

Elizabeth is 43% done

Knowing he's German makes the accent even worse.

— Feb 05, 2026 07:17AM

Elizabeth is starting

I usually love this narrator but they are using the weirdest accent.

— Feb 04, 2026 07:29AM