Harry Whitewolf’s Reviews > The Miracle Adjuster > Status Update

"Atheism was founded on a faith in something that couldn't be seen. Atheists referred to this intangible individual that they didn't believe in as 'God'. But there was currently no hard evidence for the nonexistence of God. Atheism was like one of those irrational beliefs that atheists are always up in arms about."

"A lot of people argued that the human gut was an unreliable narrator at best. A lot of people argued that the only narrator worth listening to was logic. Logic was like Morgan Freeman. It had a voice you could trust. But sometimes even Morgan Freeman could do something stupid. Sometimes logic could get it all horribly wrong.
What you saw. It wasn't always what you got."

"(There) was an outbreak of laughing to death that had struck Rio de Janeiro. And Ipswich.
George and Stevens weren't trying to ret-con the fact that people had died laughing though, they were trying to ret-con the shows people had been watching when they died.
Dying of laughter wasn't impossible to believe.
But dying of laughter while watching Two and a Half Men?"

"Tommy deleted the story exposing the fact that 'I can't believe it's not butter' is actually butter."

"...it had been pretty smart of Redstar to love-bomb the Guild of Multicultural Celebrity Impersonators and throw Chinese Tom Hanks onto the stage to argue that real Elvis was nothing more than an imposter, a multicultural impersonation of himself. And then have everyone in the crowd believe him, because real Elvis really did look as Colombian as Chanks had alleged."

"We had to use the drainpipe (to shimmy down) because the old fire escape had been removed. The old fire escape had been a health and safety risk."

"We arrived in a brightly coloured cluster of public health hazards that was rather loosely referred to as the food court..."

"'This isn't the man in the surveillance video.'
'Told you he was a demon. Betcha believe me now right?'
'He doesn't look anything like (the terrorist) Rashid Rashid.'
This didn't bother Sheriff Elmo: 'He looked like a Muslim hen he arrived, and he looks like a Muslim now.'"

"'Can I be excused? I'm allergic to PowerPoint...'"

"The real (Turin) Shroud was safely tucked away in the Bellagio Hotel where it had been ever since the Dalai Lama had won it in a game of three card Vajrayana poker."