Sarah Mac’s Reviews > Alchemised > Status Update

—“I don’t want you to kill people because of me.”
—He gave a barking laugh. “What exactly is it that you think I do with all my time? I kill people. I order other people to kill people. I train people to kill people. I sabotage & undermine people so that they will be killed, & I do it all because of you. Every word. Every life. Because of you.”

….*fail horn* A lightbulb moment for poor Helena. 😂

‘Her fingers stilled. She could see the hunger in his eyes. Possessive. Ravenous. He would drag her from the war & hide her the instant she let him. The conflict was visible in his eyes. Want. Want. Want. She felt it like her heartbeat. If he couldn’t hide her, he would hoard her to himself as much as he was able to. She’d fallen for a dragon.’

‘She tried not to cry from how desperately she wanted him, & how grateful she was that she didn’t have to ask. He pulled her closer, arms entwined around her as he aligned himself & sank into her w/ a sharp thrust, his breath burning along her neck. He was exacting. Determined to prove to her that this was where she belonged, to ensure that she could never deny what he made her feel.’

“At least before, I could console myself that it wasn’t my fault; acceptance was the best I could do to keep my mother safe. It’s different when I have no one to blame but myself.” His hand came up, his gloved fingers wrapping around her throat, pulling her forward. “After all, I did choose you.” ….This poor bastard just can’t win. 😶

‘Luc’s face was stricken, & he was so beautiful. Even in the depths of winter, he looked limned in sunlight. Divine or not, the Holdfasts had a look as if they were born to be immortalized in marble. Like the sun, born for eternity. Helena was not a planet or any celestial thing. She was just a human bound tight to the present, to the brevity of existence, & she could feel time running out.’

—Kaine Ferron was becoming something altogether new. She had finalized the process with her bare hands, drawn into completion something that he alone knew the entire purpose of.
—“Stay,” he said, his voice coaxing, pleasure-soaked, his face so close to hers. “Have a drink with me.”
—Instead of perpetually ice-sharp & guarded, he felt like something she might drown in.

‘He was in a crucible, & he was the crucible, & he would either die terribly or be wholly alchemised into something that could survive the paradox.’ ….Title alert. 😏

‘She wished she could hurt him, that there was a way for her to do it that counted. He hurt her so much, without even trying, without needing to know anything about her. He’d simply spoken her name & reduced her to property, his whims locking an iron chain around her throat.’

“No, the thing eating you alive isn’t surviving or some subconscious instinct to appease me. What you can’t bear is the isolation. The Eternal Flame’s lonely little healer, with no one left to save. No one needs you, & no one wants you.” He smiled at her, his grin almost fanged. “That’s all this is. You can’t bear being alone. You’ll do anything for the people who’ll let you love them.”

‘She’d never looked at him as something human or hot-blooded. Now he felt very human to her. She wanted him to touch her. She remembered what his hands felt like, the press of his fingertips along her jaw. She craved it so much, her skin ached. The weight she’d been desperate to escape from the night before—she wanted it.’