nathan’s Reviews > Paradise Logic > Status Update

“Exisssstence is meaninglessssssss and random. YOLO.”

..humanity shaped itself around the fact that it is possible to have a pure and open heart. And when someone is bold enough to have one of the most pure and open hearts in the world, they are bold enough to give it away to someone who will never love them back. This has been your destiny all along: to love incorrectly.”

The snake continued slithering across my foot, then stopped and opened its little mouth. “No, it’ssssssss not,” said the snake. “You can’t lie to me, I’m a ssssssnake in the dessssssert who can talk.” “Sorry, snake,” I responded. “It’s been kind of a strange journey.

A sky that was hot blue with no clouds. I looked down. A rare periwinkle garden snake wearing sunglasses slithered across my foot. It was the first living thing I had seen in so long. “Hi, snake,” I said to the snake. “My name is Girlfriend.”

It was one, two, three martinis, dry, ice-cold, and so I went to the bathroom and sat in the stall and counted the number of drinks I had consumed that evening. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

We were at one of those dancing clubs where what you do is drink a martini dry, ice-cold glass, and everyone is wearing something black and leathery and the walls are all mirrors and the music is disco balls, high hats, sparkle synthesizer.

Oh! We moved with such elegant velocity. We were like a divine girl centipede, snaking its way through the streets, bombarding the general public with our fit and flare frocks, our skirt suit sets, our dresses of fine materials such as organdy and chiffon. Us girlfriends—in our makeup, with our hair so perfect, with our nails so perfectly manicured—we were a gorgeous sight to behold.

“Reality,” said Ariel. “You’re wasted.” “Actually, I’ve only had, like, six champagne cocktails and some gin, plus some ketamine and anyways, you know that I am an idiosyncratic character who tends to speak her mind! At least I’m not serenely smoking crack cocaine. A cigarette will do!”

I was both a kike and a whore, so her words did not even bother me. And I was so in love. That was all I could focus on. It was like this now, all sound had become background noise. All human interaction outside of what I had with Ariel was now interstitial, plot points, a way to pass time.

You cannot force it. Instead, you must show kindness, grace. So let’s follow Ariel’s as she bravely tries to make him love her. Let’s follow Ariel’s on her quest. Read on, man.