Brian Skinner > Recent Status Updates

When he went through Salt Lake he said the Mormon women were ugly.

“Who are the second-best-paid women in Egypt?” “Belly dancers, because Saudi tourists throw banknotes of a hundred dollars at their feet while they are dancing.” “And who are the best-paid women in Egypt?” “The converted belly dancers, because Saudi sheikhs transfer banknotes of a thousand dollars to their account if they stop dancing.”

"As Harold sat down he remembered what he read on the wall of a bathroom at a Texaco station in Greenville, Maine. It said: The closer something gets to the speed of light, the slower time goes. It was signed Al."

"“Hello there, little earth children on the moon.” He said this with a big smile while reaching his hand out to greet them and help them into the spaceship. “Hello I’m Harold.” “Hi my name is Elizabeth.” “You’re Carl Sagan right?” “Yes I am Carl Sagan, very nice to meet you. Come on in.”

“Elizabeth, wouldn’t it be interesting if there was a little button on the side of the headstones and if you pushed it you could hear a little moment of that person’s life? “Like this one here, this little girl Tanya only lived to be 8 years old in the mid-1800s. “If there was a button to push you might hear: “ ‘I don’t think it’s cold I love it!’ “