Status Updates From Sioux Wildfire (White Squaw...

Most awkward vagina metaphors ever.

At the point in which our heroine encounters a penis whose "length reached nearly two handspans of a big man" with a base so wide she can't close her fingers around it, I'm pretty sure it's the audience being fucked with.

You know how Executioner novels over-describe modern guns? After reading a White Squaw novel, you will know exactly what "grain" which bullets are.

I can't tell if these are supposed to be Native Americans or Klingons.

The experience of reading this is basically wondering whether any give chapter is a rape chapter, a killing chapter, or a rape/killing chapter.

One day, soon, I look forward to picking up a book where the protagonist's nipples are not described in detail.

Well, that's high up in the "Top Ten Least Pleasant Passages I've Ever Read." You know, book, once you give us six pages of hinting about horrible things a psycho likes to do to people, you don't have to actually show it.

It is never a good sign when a book describes a young woman's breasts as "developing."

This book wants you to understand that this bandit is a pedophile so really, Really, REALLY bad. It's more obvious than a billboard with his picture that says "I PUT MY PENIS IN UNDERAGED GIRLS."

Imagine someone writing a half Native American character with all the racial sensitivity of a 13 year-old D & D player's half-orc.

Are we really referring to our heroine as "the half-breed?"

This looked like the trashiest, most racist Western I could imagine. I can't wait to type out progress updates for this.