Status Updates From Lancelot-Grail: The Old Fre...

AND WE HAVE REACHED ENGLAND *applause*

I have Endured, and Lancelot is finally mentioned

Hippocrates is the worst part of this so far because he's just fallen in love with (and married) a twelve-year-old, which he did as contrast to an "evil" woman he had been in love with before (she didn't believe he could raise people from the dead. Which he actually couldn't and was just conveniently not telling anyone that the "dead" he raised were still alive)

I'm so tired of these biblical OCs and the not-so-subtle ways of showing how non-obedient women are evil! The dudes who wrote this brought king Solomon as example, and now they're bringing Hippocrates; religious fanatics are the worst...

"You saw a great lake come forth from your nephew [...] From him [...] nine men [...] will descend [...] the ninth [...] will surpass the others in goodness, Jesus Christ will bathe Himself in him completely. He will not bathe clothed, but completely nude, for He will undress before him in such a way that He will reveal His great secrets to him—what He has never revealed to any mortal man." I have so many questions

"so you have a wooden lady-shaped doll in your basement and you've been fucking it for 15 years and it's the doll that you love, not your wife; our god has seen you do it and you must stop, or else" ok

"the story will recount this later, when the time and pace come" 23 Despite this announcement, nothing more is recounted about this

a good slave-owning Christian appears, holy shit

I swear, these chapters were written with target audiences in mind bc wdym there's now a specific chapter on how faith in Jesus helps women with an illness of blood loss lol

Today ilon Vulgate: symbolical baby cannibalism and Galahad the son of Joseph who was concieved without lustful unification

My Shaylaaaaaa... In deBoron the Joseph part wasn't as entertaining as the others, sure, but here it's just inventing one strawman after the other and beating you over the head with them. True Christian spirit right there

I didn’t expect the introduction to be a warning but it is. Sorta. It's telling me that this is the point when someone really wanted to control the narrative and Lancelot's ass is a battlefield. Also there's an angle where the researchers and I disagree... My philosophy professor would be proud idk