Status Updates From Neighbor George

"Normal is the big illusion. There's nobody normal in this world. Your only real duty while you're here is to become the one human being that you are"

This book continually comes out swinging with sick lines

Oh nooo! The car I never lock was stolen?? Nooo, please tell me it ain't so

Creepy neighbor who is writing a cryptic nonsense book asks you to hike with him right after he catches you inside his house.. obviously you go with him, duh

"I always wondered why people who wrote criticism were fond of saying "arguably." Did they want to argue?

Oh yeah, my type of pretentious protagonist!