Status Updates From Fierce Self-Compassion: How...

“Women are skilled at giving their hearts. The problem is that we give away our power with our hearts if we believe that the source of love and safety lies in a relationship with a partner, rather than in a relationship with ourselves” (p. 285).

“When we give ourselves the attention we long to receive from others, we become remarkably self-sufficient” (p. 288).

“[W]e start to subordinate what we really want in order to make others happy. This is partly why so many women say yes when they want to say no; they’re afraid no one will love them unless they do” (p. 252).

Self-care: “This is a form of fierce self-compassion aimed at providing for ourselves through activities like taking walks, doing yoga, and eating well” (p. 262).

Judo “the gentle way”: “For example, while giving an employee or team member instructions—taking charge the way a leader should—if you smile or ask about the person’s well-being, it can soften the negative perception that you’re being demanding” (p. 236).

“The first question to ask yourself is what do I need to care for myself right now?” (p. 243).

(p. 197) Motivating Self-Compassion Break:
1. ‘This is my vision of what I want for myself.’
2. ‘ growing pains are part of being human’
3. Supportive gesture (hand on shoulder or fist pump)
4. ‘I have your back. I will support you.’

“Another reason we pummel ourselves is because it gives us the illusion of control” (p. 199).