Status Updates From Boyfriend for Hire (Escorts...

“I drink in the sight of her, my mouth twitching with a smile. She's beautiful. Real. Adorable as fuck.”

“So maybe that's what I have to do. Ask Elle out, sleep with her, and be done with it. I should know better than anyone that anticipation makes cocks harder and panties wetter.”

“Maybe the problem is simpler than I originally thought. Maybe the fact that I'm keeping myself from her is making this whole situation seem a lot more exciting than it really is. I spend time with beautiful women who want to fuck me all the time. The only thing that makes this one any different is that I won't let myself have her.”

“Something about the water always makes me feel a little better.”

“Honestly, I wish feelings were as easy to get rid of as headaches. Then at least I could take a couple of pills and be done with it.”

“Our connection wasn't about the circumstances,”

“I always thought the idea of soul mates was stupid, that there was no way there was really someone out there for everyone. That people who bought into that shit were chumps.”

“I know I look good... actually, better than good. It's not being cocky if it's true, and I was blessed with good genetics. That's just a fact of life.”