Status Updates From A Girl Is a Half-formed Thing

"Stag i can't stan i cn.an't stan i fall down on the splish of the water run it. See my invisible face. i'm drowned i'm awake i'm drowned. No your brother is and not you.
Clickedy click the lights are off. Are on. Water take all. Boil up. i slip in the deep. My face go under there. Purple waves and taste of foam.
You. No. Not here. i'm burn."

"Go she says and have a bath. Lie down and later someone'll take you to get a stitch in that.

I open the door look at. You're awake saying what's gone on you're not. I wish. You were."

"What are you on about? Your lies and lies are. Have you no shame? Mammy. All my shame I give to you. I'm turning off the lights I'm shutting down my doors. What do you mean by that? Don't turn your back on me. What do you mean? Nothing Mammy. I've had enough do you hear me? Enough of you. Your face. You're a state. Making a show of yourself on today of all days."

"I'm screaming in the blackness. Scream until I'm done my body. Full of nothing. Full of dirt the. I am. My I can. There there breath that. Where is your face off somewhere. Where am I lay down this tool. I fall I felled. I banged my face head I think. Time for somewhere. Isgoinghome.
I get there I get. I get to the door. I am. Bleed blood on my mouth. Gone. My I know it's there. Was. Salt and iron. Gone."

"Don't I come all mouth of blood of choking of he there bitch there bithc there there stranlge me strangle how you like it how you think it is fun grouged breath sacld my lungs til I. Puk blod over me frum. In the next but. Let me air. Soon I'n dead I'm sre. Loose. Ver the aIrWays. Here. mY nose my mOuth I. VOMit. Clear. CleaR. He stopS up gETs. Stands uP.
Thanks to your uncle for that like the best fuck I ever had."

"Hear the way he. Sloows. Hurts m. Jesus skreamtheway he. Doos the fuck the fuckink slatch in me. Scream. Kracks. Done fuk me open he dine done on me. Done done Til he hye happy fucky shoves upo comes ui. Kom shitting ut h mith fking kmg I'm fking cmin up you. Retch I. Retch I. Dinneradntea I choke mny. Up my. Thrtoat I. He come hecomehe. More. Slash the fuck the rank the sick up me up he and sticks his fingers in."

"Thighs in claws I vice. Rip m open. I make this. I make this. Undone he push my face hye pusk my head. My eyes flat of his hand. In the skull my. In the muck of my crown of stones. Don't break me open face open. Crushing I hear boines on done he up me fuck me. Smeeling he I don't not do this I a don't know he's fuck me. Stucks the fck the thing in. Me. In. Jesus. I nme. Go. Away."

"Get off me. By the wrist and the hair on my head. I'm. No this isn't. No I. Slap. My brother. No. Shut up. Shut up. My brother died. He's died he's. I don't care a single fuck about. Where's your uncle is he here? Is he here? Scream until I. He. That means no. Enough of that and strike. So hard. Home. On my face. Spew I think of blood or words I bit down on my tongue. Turn the eye off it won't. He punch the bag me."

"He says. I've been waiting for you. Days and days. I knew you wouldn't be long. Where's the. Not. Looking close til I see him in the dark. Behind my eye. That man whose face is broken up. That man whose face is scratches and cuts. That man who say girleen like a song."

"Someone coming I make. It look. Down from mountains and hills. Angel save me. Fill my mouth. Comes. And so I make. He comes and comes til I see. Through the broken trees. Through the kicked-down weeds and nettle all the same. Through eyelids I have. Close. I make.
He says out from the twilight. From my brain. You've come here. I know. Quick and should be done. Give myself to the. My will be done."

"Across the lake lights of cars and bikes and roaring off somewhere I'm here. In the dark. Where the lights. Where the water. Calm and kind. Benevolent with thorns and stones I. Know. I smell the same. As something. Once is me. Where I walk. Don't think. Where I'm not frightened. Face of the water. I know. Face of the grass ai lie in. Lay broke upon.
It's the devil. I do here. Swallow glass the whole way down."

"Don't stop running.
From my. Stone walls and schools and hospitals.
Eyes burn with thud through arteries and eyeball veins. Street lamps curling light. Restaurants and pubs I twisted that. I hear. My tongue. I hold. My scream mouth shut. Turn the little road. This little road. Go in here. Now you. Go in the. Black."

"I run. No. To get out quick I. Out of my way. Run the run the. To the door. Down the street and on til the house rips out of my head. Where the what's the. Something fix this. I know to fix this. I want. And I fix this place where I can run. This gouge will drive me mad. Where's comfort where's safe. From here. I run from where you are not.
The pant of it. In the dank. Lungs heave up blood they would if I. Don't--"

"I think I'm sleeping now.
Come down to pray. Get down and pray for your brother. If you cared at all.
The house of silent people here.
Me. Gone to the dogs she is my mother say."

"The doorbell ring again again now. This is the day when the heavens and the deluge came. For they're coming to say sorry they're. I've heard about. I brought a wreath. But it's only a few hours since. I hear the hum. Of buzz of them. The everyone who ever knew are coming in are coming in. And someone's making sandwiches and someone's pouring tea.
Not. I'm not. Kneel on the carpet rub my skin to burn."

"I am crouching by your bed they've stripped the sheets the bare. I see that. Mattress. You were just there. I rub it with my hands I. Smooth it. Your. It. Bed. That you sleep on.
Every day. That you're sleeping. Smell that. Every. Day. Come back. Not. That's the. Shush. Is it him? Touch my head. Touch my face. Your poor eyes what have you done? Nothing. Shush shush darling. Leave me ....
Left. I. I am. Left alone."

"... My eyes are burning up the inside of my head I'm. Something gut the insides something. Pulling out the entrails something. There. Something there. He slurp the chew the. Mince. Like a dog sucking marrow in the bone.
That mother of us took to her bed. Hear her there. Screaming there of. My son."

"Going to say what a good death you have made. What a saintly. What a sad. Young one. Gathered to himself the very best. Left. The shit and trash behind I sit on the kitchen chair and someone give me shepherd's pie. I sit on the kitchen chair. I sit on the kitchen chair. I drink my water. I've gone to the blank. I've gone to the. Gone to the.
Eat some more. You'll need your..."

"Who am I talking to? Who am I talking to now?

In the afternoon the undertaker came his hands are ready. Wrap you in your sheet and he and uncle put you in a coffin. Put the lid on tight. Put you in the hearse back. He take you away.
We can't clean. We won't do those things. And fill you with formaldehyde.
Cleaning you all you away. Later. When they'll bring you back here. Again."

"The only. I put my face. Inside your arm. Hold the wave of the. Ocean of that. Torn me. In two. Save. Clinging on the.
No. No one.
Drag me down."

"My heart. Comes broken now.
Broken off in me. Some flake falling off the sky. Off the. My. You. Where the day is light the sun come in. Give me. Not your face. You're. Marble in the mountain. See you. I touch your. Awful face. Cooling like. I don't even think I can't even think. Do that. You're making my hands cold. My hands for warm you. Not only. No not this time..."

"Where the sky burst. They started to cry weep the cry out. Oh why oh lord oh why."

"Please don't go no. Not. Go. I. Please don't leave. There's the. Air flying out. Your eyes on me. They. You are.
Silent.
Breath. Lungs go out. See the world out.
You finish that breath. Song breath.
You are gonna out tide. And you close. Drift. Silent eyes. Good-bye.
My. lllllllllllllllllllllll. Love my. Brother no.
Silent. He's gone. He's gone. Good-bye.
No. Oh please. My.
Done. And. Quiet.
And.
Gone."

"I do not see [them]. I am holding yours. I am holding your hand close. My love. That's the best in the. Ssssssh to me. In the land. Couldn't help ssshhh. I'm here. Think I think all about, all I can, about you now."