Status Updates From Chinglish: Found in Transla...

Let's leave gladly and come back safely.

Sign at the entry to the train station:
"Be prepared for danger in times of safety."

Great advice!

Dongda Hospital For Anus and Intestine Disease Beijing

Interesting take on the "keep off the grass" sign:

"Green grass dreading your feet."

Please don't dump your receipt and keep it carefully to avoid gangster get your information.

Warning sign:
"Please love your life"

From a menu:
"Man and wife lung slice"

No thank you

The horse carriage used in ancient time is equivalent to Mercedes Benz today, it ranks very high.

A sign in Chinese is standard, a sign in Chinese and gibberish pinyin is better, and a sign in Chinese and something resembling English is best of all. This, of course, isn’t called translating, but decorating. English words are placed solely for domestic consumers. They are meant for display, not for information. That helps to explain why one finds “Are you praised when it’s great?” on men’s underwear in China.

Unnecessary words are the trademark of Chinglish translations: “these constitute important conditions in striving for the fulfilment of the general task in the transitional period” clearly needs some polishing. Another classic example is the tendency toward nominal style, such as, “The prolongation of the existence of their temple is due to the solidity of its construction.”

English may be defined as a hypotactic language, whereas Chinese is rather paratactic. English relies heavily on a logical sequence; Chinese is deeply rooted in its graphic imagery. Both need to be taken into consideration when attempting to cross the cultural border. That is why a word-by-word translation usually fails or produces unintelligible content which is at best humorous if not hazardous at times.

(2/2) and tacticians in foreign ministries around the world. English, that local Germanic dialect spoken by one hundred fifty thousand people in the fifth century who survived the perpetual threat of extinction by Danish invaders, has come a long way indeed. Non-native speakers now outnumber native speakers by a ratio of about three to one.

(1/2) Nearly four hundred million people speak it as their mother tongue, another six hundred million as their second language. A billion are learning it, a third of the world’s population is exposed to it, and The Economist predicts that by 2050 half the world will be in some way proficient in it: English is globalization’s number one language, the communicative tool for trade, techniques,

Chinglish is very often funny because of the sometimes scarily direct nature of the new meaning produced by the translation. A “deformed man toilet” in Shanghai or an “anus hospital” in Beijing is funny because it instantly destroys linguistic euphemisms we Westerners have carefully built up when talking about sensitive topics. Chinglish annihilates these conventions right away. Chinglish is right in your face.

On the cover:
"You can enjoy the fresh air after finishing a civilized urinating."

I'm already cackling :D