riley :p

“You must choose which stones to carry, for if you try to carry them all, you will be dragged down by their weight and drown in the depths. But you may find that as you swim, you grow stronger for the stones in your pockets. You may find you can carry more than you knew.”
― Amie Kaufman, Beyond the End of the World

“Now, come over here so I can pat you down."
"But you don't have-" Percy stopped. "Uh, sure."
He stood next to the armless statue. Terminus conducted a rigorous mental pat down.
"You seem to be clean," Terminus decided. "Do you have anything to declare?"
"Yes," Percy said. "I declare that this is stupid.”
― Rick Riordan, The Son of Neptune

“Hey, I'm a Poseidon kid. I can't drown, and neither can my pancakes.”
― Rick Riordan

“Halleluiah, another teenage boy was even stupider than I was. I looked positively good and normal compared to Tyler Crowley, even if I was an obsessed emo-psycho stalker.”
― Anna Jones Buttimore, Twilight: Midnight Sunburn: A light parody of Midnight Sun