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Ambrose Bierce
“Bore, n.: A person who talks when you wish him to listen.”
Ambrose Bierce, The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary

Ambrose Bierce
“NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi.”
Ambrose Bierce, The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary

Ambrose Bierce
“Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.”
Ambrose Bierce , The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary

Ambrose Bierce
“Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum -- "I think that I think, therefore I think that I am;" as close an approach to certainty as any philosopher has yet made.”
Ambrose Bierce, The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary

Ambrose Bierce
Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.”
Ambrose Bierce, The Unabridged Devil's Dictionary

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