Homestuck just for fun!! discussion
Archives
>
rp# 3 (alpha/beta)
TG: I'm so totally sexy, Harley. You know that. Just to screw with Jade, he sent a picture of himself to her.
TG: U look like Dick! Roxy almost had a heart attack. This Dave kid was HAWT.
She looked at John's response
TG: R u fiveteen lick me?
Mod
EB: you're still really cool though.
EB: it's PARADOX people! you can't date your son!
TG: Bu he's hawt! And I havnt given bith*birth to him yet!
TG: Ur f***ing adorable, Harley. Dave thought Jade was beautiful, but he wasn't going to tell her that.
TG: And I don't want my mom to be an alcoholic, thank you very much.
Ew, this Roxy chick was stranger than Rose.
TG: Oh mi gosh, Jade, u luk like jane, with long hair.
Mod
John looked to the side. Dave and jade were clearly in looooooove. Well yeah. He sighed. It's not like he was jealous, just left out of this picture sending frenzy of creepy stories and paradox mothers hitting on their teenage sons.
TG: You're welcomeTG: Are you jealous, Egderp? You want me to write a real life fanfic with you and Rose? WITH BONDAGE?
TG: Nah, nah, Jadey, here's another stori. U beta read it!Roxy was so happy! Dirk was so yummy. She realized she had just written that in her newest novel 'Fifty Shades of Dirkier.'
TG: Oh, gog, Lalonde, that was GROSS? Really, Lalonde? My brother does not even like cheap motels.
Mod
John looked at the screen. Stupid cool guy Dave being so cool. Stupid me being so boring. If only I could be a super cool hero like in star wars, or doctor who, or con air, then everyone would want to see my picture..! Bluh.
I probably look boring anyway. He thought blankly.
TG: Wait, egboob, u like my datter?! YOU DO ANYTING WIF HER AND I KILL U!
TG: I'm writing it, Egderp. Here:TG: Once upon a time there was a chick named Rose and a dude named Egderp. And then they did it.
Dave stared at his reflection in the mirror. He had no idea why everyone liked him. It wasn't his fault that he was tall, with blond hair!
TG: Dave duznt lick it, do :(She sighed and frowned. Dave did look a little like her, she supposed. Maybe it was the large eyes?
Mod
He hadn't even met Rose in real life...and here was everyone assuming he loved her. And what was with the nicknames.!!? God, being the youngest was annoying.
TG: Hey, dunt say dat about mi son! Hez an amazing riter!
Mod
EB: yeah yeah sure.
TG: Okai, Egboob, I dun no u, but u r nut going to do it wif my daughter((No, Kanaya and Rose are going to get married and adopt a baby Dave))
TG: Fine, Egderp, want a plot?!TG: But Rose got pregnant and Egderp said he wasn't the father. So they went to the Maury show and Egderp was the father.
TG: Happy now?
Mod
EB: like any of you would care enough to really want to know.
TG: Uh, thanks? Jus caring about mi dauter.She read Dave's latest post
TG: U DID IT WIF MY DOTER, EGBOOB, AND SHE HAD UR BABBY?!
TG: Yes, Rose told me she had Egderp's baby. She is currently in the hospital, waiting for Egderp to arrive.TG: She named the baby Liv Taylor.
TG: WUT, ILL KEEL YOU, EGBOOB! KEEL YOU!Roxy stared at the wall and smashed her vodka bottle. She needed some time to think. And some time to become Dirk's true love.
TG: Oh, gog, you are too funny, Lalonde. Why couldn't Rose be more like you?
TG: No, she's boring as hell with her sh*t and stuff like that.TG: You're entertaining, Lalonde.
((I know))TG: Bu..she's mi datter. And Dave, dunt say dat about ur sister.
TG: I wish I had 1.
Roxy was so LONELY! If only Dirk could be her knight in shining armor and they could live out her entire romance novels.
But then Dirk would get shot in the end and Roxy would live on bravely with their two children.
Mod
EB: your stupid coolkid son is making it up!!!
John made a face in annoyance. Why did these people all like teasing him so much?! Even jade.. Really ?! Really creator of all that is fair and good in the universe?!
TG: No, I'm not, Mom. Here, here's a picture of your child.Dave sent John a picture of a badly drawn baby.
TG: Congratulations. I'm an uncle now.
TG: Did you just call me stupid, Egderp?Dave sighed.
TG: What, just because I'm blond, you think I'm stupid?
Mod
EB: we're apparentally siblings.
EB: and no it's not because you're blonde!
TG: Yeah, well, if you are, Egderp, then you must be as hot as her.Dave was bi, so why not?
TG: Imma blonde, 2!Well...sorta. With that hair dye she was. She just wanted to look like her mom! Couldn't a girl try to be pretty without having a hideous shade of brown?!
TG: U sound like jake and jane.
TG: Yeah right, Lalonde. Rose tells me you use like..five hundred dye bottles a week.He looked at Jade's post
TG: Yeah, I do, actually.
Mod
He sent a picture of himself to Roxy.
EB: wait what?!
Did Dave just imply he was hot..?! The same about his sister?! This was crazy all over.
TG: WHHHAAAA!Roxy began to cry. So what if she had her hair dyed?
TG: I just want to be pretty!
Roxy opened the picture of John and she almost fainted
TG: U look like Mr. corcker!
Oh, Mr. Crocker. She had so much disgusting fanfiction of the two of them.
TG: ThanksHe looked at Lil' Cal.
TG:OH, F*CK, BRO! WHAT THE FU-
TG: Sorry about that...
He looked at Roxy's post
TG: You're still a choice babe, Lalonde.
Mod
John looked at the screen intently. He sent pictures of himself to Dave and Jade for the heck of it. If he looked like...oh no..if his paradox hunch was right.. This wouldn't be good.
TG: U think so? Roxy looked at herself.
TG: Shud I stop dying my hair?
TG: Mr. Corker...and Jake. Jake and me had a babby once.Roxy laughed.
TG: Wow, dayum, Egderp. You're so totally hot.Dave hoped his brother wasn't seeing this.
"BRO! MISS LALONDE WRITES SMUT ABOUT YOU!" he yelled. To that, his brother threw a smuppet in his face.
Mod
EB: are you talking about Jane? or a relative of her..?
TG: Im taking about her dad...oh, hez sssoooo hawt.Roxy smiled. She stared at Jade's post
TG: I wish I had har lick urs.
Mod
John frowned, this was NOT. Good.
EB: Roxy, this is important. you said you had a mom, right? what's she like? do Dirk or Jake have any human relatives like Jane, living or dead??
TG: I KKNNNOOOWWW, LALONDE, DAYUM!He was messing with her.
TG: Yo, my bro wants to talk to you, babe.
TG: And Jade, you're so totally hot.
TG: My bran hurts frum thinkings.TG: Um... I hav a mom. She wuz rlly prrtty wif blonde har and purple eyes.
TG: Jake haz a dead grama and dirk haz a dead bother
*brother
TG: Me and Jake are de only 1s left.
TG: You're an idiot, Lalonde. You're my mother.